Tuesday, March 21, 2006

living the rock star dream

...not as such.
But a good stab at it though. Friday night involved pink martinis and oppulence at an Oppenheimer birthday party, while Saturday involved dehydration, 45 000 people, peeing in bushes, tot packs, disappointment over how many commercial songs Metallica played (like hardly any)...and a whopper of a fight with Small Bum.

He dropped me off about 2 kilometres from my door at 1:30 am after the concert, leaving me fuming and stinky. The next morning, looking like Frankenstein's spawn after zero sleep and a mean hangover, he pitched up at my flat, also luckily looking like death. We argued then made up, had make up sex and slept the entire day.

Why did we fight, you ask? (Or maybe you don't ask, but I tell anyway):
This is why. Please take into account the prior consumption of cane tot packs.
SB: So...if I was in an accident tomorrow and became a paraplegic, would you break up with me?
Me: Jeeziz. I have no idea. But I'd at least try and give it my best shot. You?
SB: It probably wouldn't last, no.
Me: Well fuck you very much.

And so it went.

Conclusion: never even talk about that stuff. Ever. Especially after 20 tot packs each.

Then there was my ex R, who has usurped ex S in favourite ex stakes, because he's pleasant on the odd occasion, who was asking me on Friday if and when I plan to start producing children.
Ex R: You like kids?
Me: Depends. If I can give them back, yes.
Ex R: Do you want children?
Me: I guess. Like in 10 years time.
Ex R: Seriously?
Me: Huh?
Ex R: Huh?
Me: What?
Ex R: Oh ok.

Enough with the hectic stuff already! Paraplegism and children, it's more than I can take!


MBoy said...

Cane/Cain is the root of all evil....me and mine drank Captain & Coke....passed out in the car after Metallica and woke up when most of the traffic was gone....no deep debates for us...nothing more taxing than "Fancy a toasted cheese and tom"

zuzula said...

lordy.... thank god for small talk..... ;)

Peas on Toast said...

MBoy - that's what we shoulda woulda coulda done. But no, we were all too tired and cranky to spend much more time together.

Zu - small talk. Or lack thereof either way ;)

zuzula said...

i think i need you to send me some of this cane stuff...

Peas on Toast said...

We have one or two tot packs lying around. Easy to post.
But are you sure you want to join the cane train? My fabulous hairdresser once said to me, "Cane is for cinstruction workers (Peas). Drinking it will give you a bad reputation if nothing else."

He's right. But if you do want to try it, I'll send you the remainder of our tot packs. :)

bimbling said...


Being stupid (and from the UK) but what are "cane tot packs"?

Stupid of Ashby...

Jam said...

Maybe you should have stuck to zee Vodka??

zuzula said...

I do want to try it - I'm very curious! and hey - I could be a construction worker. how hard can it be? :)

alternatively - next time you're london bound bring some with you and we can share the experience

Peas on Toast said...

Hi Bimbling - you're not thick at all. Seems that Brits and Yanks don't know what cane is - Zuzula has always been mystified herself.
Basically: a strong piant stripper kind of a spirit that isn't good for you. Stick to vodka :)

Zuzula - deal. Next time I'm in Blighty, I'll bring you over some cane. But don't say I didn't warn you! :)

Rays said...

Peas - you're the shit! Utterly entertaining!

Peas on Toast said...

That's Rays. I love being the shit. :)

zuzula said...

I shall hold you to that!