Thursday, June 15, 2006

third roommate’s birthday

That’s today. So, happy happy TR!

I’m not a good present buyer. In that I mean I find it hard to find the right thing for the right person. Some people are easier to buy for than others of course, but that doesn’t make it easier. Until yesterday.

I swung into Big Blue/Kitsch & Kool in Rosebank. (They’ve merged. I’m undecided whether this is fabulous or not.) Still, one of my favourite places to spend my entire pension fund in one afternoon on ridiculous knick knacks. I immediately found the perfect gift for Third Roommate.

1) A t-shirt with a neon sticker thing in the front, but wait for it – the shirt comes with it’s own remote control. Which automatically illuminates the neon sticker. Next time the man is jamming in a club, all he has to do is switch his shirt on, and hey presto! The chicks will find him in dark corners, the parking lot, under the bar counter…

2) Racing grannies. Complete with Zimmer frames. Two plastic wind-up gerry atricks complete with faceless expressions and wooly cardigans. There were nuns and rabbis too, but racing grannies would particularly appeal to his [twisted and acrimonious] sense of humour.

He loved it. Bless.

Last night three mates came over to commiserate with me pertaining to the state of our lives. P is having a career crisis (I can emphathise), J got dumped on Friday, and C, well C has no issues as such, except she pulled a bum muscle. J’s assholic dumper put things into perspective for me. It’s been four weeks to the button, and I’m ok. J, however, is not.
I was honest and told her that the first two weeks are hell, then you start to pick up the pieces of your collective busted ego, shattered heart and the remaining threads of your fucked-up dignity and slowly try to piece them all back together. Kind of like a work of art. A vase, if you will.

OK now I’m just talking shit.

I drank too much wine last night. One of my Warhols fell off the wall and landed on me while I dreamt about being lost on a construction site with millions of chameleons. I almost had an aneurysm in my bed, as it fell on my head. Marilyn is one scary bitch right up close.

Mental note: must steal more Prestik from work.

20 comments:

GoDsGiMp said...

I love the way when you steal the prestik, no one notices and after a week all the posters start to fall down..

Maths class in high school- turned the poster's saying pie equals etc, upside down. Teach took 2days to figure it out.

Peas on Toast said...

Bless! Well essentially I haven't stolen the prestik yet. But there's a giant ball of the stuff in the stationery cupboard. I will be leaving with it tonight.

fly said...

My cats have decided that having cat fights at 3 in the morning is quite possibly the most pleasure a feline can have... :o? ...I on the other hand have different sentiments....

And the problem with prestik right now is its so cold....the damn stuff wont stik...everything falls off...

Oh and Big Blue also have a really rocking store in Linden tho all they sell is really kitch retro stuff str8 out of the 70s...R3000 for a fan, gulp...

fly said...

It is a cool fan tho...wink*

Anonymous said...

Mmmm...Big Blue in Linden have some wonderful retro 60's and 70's furniture. And it doens't need prestik.
How about block mounting the prints? Although if they fell on you in the middle of the night, you might end up a little flatter than you are now...
(PS Where did the prints come from again?)

Anonymous said...

Am I the only one who noticed the chameleons and the construction site?

Hello PEAS. Not well...........you.....yet again.....methinks you suffering from BWWS

Big Willy Withdrawal Symptoms

Phil

Anonymous said...

Ja, call me an anally retentive nit picker, but after going to all the trouble to buy warhol prints online, why are you sticking them up with prestik? you know that in a few weeks time each corner will have grease stains and have started to curl... go get em framed or block mounted and nail the feckers to the wall, that way they can stay out of your dreams of long tongued reptiles. Oh sorry, did I mention long tongues??

Peas on Toast said...

Fly - cat fight at at 3am. That's nasty dollface. Good luck with that. :)
PS: I must definitely check out the Linden branch.

Jam - Thought about block mounting them. And probably will in the near future. Best I get me some good nails. We ordered them on Art.com.

Phil - that's very plausible.

Daytripper - I got the same grief from Small Bum about the prestik issue. It's a temporary arrangement. I've guarded the corners with sellotape so that there are no oil marks.

fly said...

eck, sellotape....you did not...?! :oP

yeah and theres is nothing quite like a heart wrenching scream/meow/growl at 3 in the morning to destroy your bliss....I nearly have a heart attack everytime it happens....

This is what happens when you introduce a new female to 2 new males....and the scary thing is she is the one being a bitch...the other 2 are very complacent...all they want to do is sleep :oP

Peas on Toast said...

Yip - Fly this happens when two females of human nature are in a room fighting over two males themselves. Ah, the beauty and predictability of nature...;)

Yes, sellotape on the back of the posters, so that the prestik doesn't seep through the print. Just on the corners. How's that for forward planning? :)

GoDsGiMp said...

Wow pea's that like.. teleckinesic?

omg I bet you can tell me how to spell that to :)

Peas on Toast said...

Godsgimp, my sweetness, I'd love to help you out, but what exactly is teleckinesic?

Revolving Credit said...

Chameleon construction workers? - WTF were they building, a tree house???

Last week rat races, this week granny races - me thinks you have a fetishist gambling addiction!!

PS. What did it feel like being jumped by Marilyn??

GoDsGiMp said...

hmm.. telekinetic.. telecommunication.. maybe wrong word.. how about omnipotent..

muddlepuddle said...

Happy Birthday to TR!

Muddle's bday present list for Peas so far:

1. Playsatation Karaoke thingy
2. Marilyn Monroe:The complete last sitting (Bert Stern) - this way the pics can be in a book and you will not have to worry about being attacked by the giant killer poster ever again
3. Gift vouchers to the Corlett Drive sex shop she frequents
4. Double sided tape (I just feel Prestik is 1990's)

Peas on Toast said...

Revolving - No, it was this old house. And there were chameleons freaking everywhere. Jumping on me. I think I'm a little fucked up at the moment. ;)
PS: Marilyn freaked me out.

Godsgimp - ah! telekinetic. I geddit now. ;)

Muddle - perfect. What more could a girl like me want? (Let's assume heels and an Audi A3 is just par for the course :)
I'm checking the stationery cupboard at the minute ofr some of that double-sided tape...

Champagne Heathen said...

Not to cause concern, but I do know that one of the folklores in SA is that the presence of geckos are a sign of a male baby on the way. Perhaps chameleons represent something similar...
(This does not help me either, as I seem to have a new gecko office mate scurrying the walls!)

Champagne Heathen said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Peas on Toast said...

Champs - if I was having sex over the last month I would be worried I could possibly be with [male] child.

But thank heavens, there is not even the extricable possibility of this at the minute.

Still - maybe one of my mates. I will duly warn them! :)

Revolving Credit said...

All those chameleons can only mean that you're overdue for a decent tongue lashing. (interpret as you like)