Wednesday, October 18, 2006

why does everything break at once?

Honestly, there's not much more irritating than when everything just decides to stop functioning altogether. At once. With everything else.

Our DStv is broken. Dead. Home & Away cravings ensue, and it's not pretty.

Blogger is bust. Evidenced by comments-access problems below. Pants.

My hands-free kit has gone pop, as seen by mysteriously missing earpiece. It ceases to work now, as said earpiece seems quite important in the fine cognicense of things, and now can't listen to the bloody radio.

The plug fitting in my boudoir at home, which is the sole point for which my computer, numerous lights, speakers, charger, etc. has blown. I now run to my bed in darkness, because I'm scared of the Boogeyman grabbing me from under my bed. I'm not afraid to admit this incessant fear. And I can't read my sex-porn literature before retiring, as I have no fudging lights. Pretty our maid must've done it, since it worked perfectly fine yesterday.

My passenger electric window still doesn't work. Crap shit.

I need a holiday.

31 comments:

Champagne Heathen said...

At least:
-this post's comments seem to be working,
-your car has a/c (I assume);
-and some necessary items in your 'boudoir' only require batteries!

You can join Jam in South American Inca trailblazing & llama-catching.

Peas on Toast said...

Tooshay Champers. My car does have a/c, I have a battery operated, um, apparatus in my room, and these comments are working thus far.

Although llama catching does sound awfully exotic...:)

Anonymous said...

peas, get your self an extension lead.. wouldn't want you to get snached by the boogeyman.

Peas on Toast said...

Thanks Anon.
That Boogeyman wants to eat me for dinner, I'm certain of it. The extension cord could save my life.

joe said...

Peas, I was going to ask if Pretty had anything to do with everything breaking. It's a fascinating South African phenomenon. Call it the Domestic Wrecker Syndrome. :-)

Llamas aren't as easy to catch as you may think. They're quick! And, if you do get close, they spit in your face! Much like a Sea Point Bergie! Ask me, I know!

Peas on Toast said...

Joe - a bergie has spat in your face before??

Oh my greatness dollface.

joe said...

haha, no - a llama!!

Champagne Heathen said...

Even if you had been spat at by a bergie, I reckon you'd be ok. Their digestive tract must be so coated in meths that no dodgy disease could survive!

And that's why you have to approach the llama from behind.

Peas on Toast said...

Joe ok better, although having a llama's spitool on your face must be a sloppy experience. :)

Rear-end the llama! Rear-end the llama! From behind!

joe said...

I'll pass on the rear-ending! Might turn ugly! Peas and Champers, the llama's all yours!

Peas on Toast said...

Joe we gonna need you to hold him from the front. In safety goggles.

We like big strong men in safety goggles.

Champagne Heathen said...

Llamas are also particularly attracted to men in safety googles too, I hear.

kyknoord said...

Coincidence or conspiracy?

ChewTheCud said...

Peas sneaking up on unsuspecting llamas with a battery operated device.... scary!

Peas on Toast said...

Kyk - definitely a conspiracy.
God: He he he, Moses, Peter and Abraham, get your asses into my office.
"What is it sir?" (In unison)
God: I'm bored. Let's have some fun, whaddoyouguyssay - how about we break everything in Peas' sight?
[clapping hands with glee] "Oh yes! Yes! She's a hoot when she's frustrated!"
God: [breaks everything electronic in Peas' site in one foul swoop]

And they all sit and watch. And think it's funny.

Conspiracy definitely.

Jam said...

I can't get to sleep with the cupboard door open, thank goodness it's not electronic.
I'm with you. Half my computer blew up in protest while I was on leave last week.

Peas on Toast said...

Chew - who said anything about battery operated? Unless Joe comes battery operated of course. ;)

Jam said...

Perhaps if I had that llama, the cupboard door wouldn't seem as threatening...

Peas on Toast said...

Jam - let's go on strike. Keen?

Jam said...

Okay. But what will our picket signs say?

Revolving Credit said...

I think you broke these things an purpose.
After Uncertain-someone-who-you-may-be-seeing-called-R-boyfriend-boyfriend-Peas-has-a-boyfriend fixed your bicycle last week, I think you have decided to really test his metal.

"That Boogeyman wants to eat me"
So who is this operating under the alias 'The Boogeyman'?
Sounds fun!

Peas on Toast said...

Jam - "Fuck everything electronic", "We want typewriters back" "Living with the boogyman sucks balls". ?

REv - Yes Reverend, I broke all this shit on purpose so that he-with-the-long-name can fix it all for me. And I can sit and watch, mouth agape and drooling. You got me big guy. Clever, clever boy ;)

The Boogeyman must've etaen the spare earpiece on my hands-free. Cos he didn't give me any lovin' that I can remember. ;)

Champagne Heathen said...

For electrical things though he won't need to pull out his spanner, but will rather require a screwdriver

Revolving Credit said...

"Cos he didn't give me any lovin' that I can remember. ;) "

"Living with the boogyman sucks balls"

Thats why you ain't getting from the Boogeyman, he's gay....hahaha

Peas on Toast said...

Champers - luckily I have my own screwdriver. I shalt not rely on men!

Rev - But of course. Asking for a straight man to live under my bed right now would be asking too much. Of course he's a queen. Just like of course ALL MY SHIT HAS TO BREAK IN ONE DAY.

FUCK.

Jam said...

Probably why he also enjoys lurking in my cupboard - he's looking for something to wear.

Peas on Toast said...

Jam - tell him to get out of the closet, put the dress down and do something useful for a change like pass me a screwdriver while I fiddle with life-threatening 1 000 ampage wires.

Revolving Credit said...

"pass me a screwdriver while I fiddle"

Wmahaahahahaaha.....

Jam said...

Put the wire down, Peas. You don't want to permanently look like you did on Saturday at your eighties thing.

nicole said...

yay i am not alone, there is another non 5year old also scared of the boogey man! i stand on my bed (therefore no legs on floor for boogey man to grab) and strrreeetch to switch the lights off, then throw myself under the covers!! sad i know!!

Peas on Toast said...

Nicole - yay! (Or not yay about the boogeyman fear) but yay, we're not alone!