Tuesday, February 20, 2007

great scott

So for the first time in 3.5 months, I hit The Manhattan Club on Friday.
There might’ve been the dry humping of walls and staircases.

It was Little Ant’s (Piccolo Ant’s) birthday, and during some 6-inch stiletto squeaking on the dancefloor, a woman – a woman, a frau, a ragazza, a mademoiselle, a sinorita - tried to stick her hand up my top while I innocently executed my own version of the electric slide like an emu on ecstasy.
We decided to call it a night thereafter.

Beforehand, C held a delightful cocktail do at her place complete with silver water jugs. She has all the bells and whistles when it comes to culinary utensils. We have half a set of cutlery, ten steak knives, a plastic jug or two. C has the full range. Splendid.

Sunday was a blast – literally. We went shooting. Clay pigeons and rabbits, that spring out of a machine when you scream your preference in gun jargon: AUTO PILOT, DOUBLE TEALS! PULL! PILOT MINI RABBITS PULL!

I have a massive bruise on my right scapula, a sore hand and a rather large right cheek bone from rifle thrust.
Team Pigeon were the shit, except for me.

The experience, had on the outer stretch of Jo’burg’s veld, was more so that I could shoot a gun and see what it feels like (fucking marvellous), notsomuch so that I could actually hit something.
God it felt great to squeeze a trigger, and imagine my former house mistresses face when aiming (but not hitting) the targets.
Ramone, C and a couple of others were brilliant – that’s because they’ve been shooting stuff their whole lives.
Out of twenty-five rounds, I managed to shoot one clay rabbit. I also released smoking bullet cartridges into Ramone’s face by accident.
I am a hero.

Gung ho jolly hockeysticks.


Daedalus said...

Pheck - I had to look that up!

Jam said...

Aha, Manhattans. I've never been there. But after what you and Champs have said about it, I somehow I doubt I ever will.

C said...

You are such a good shooter...he he he. Ace shot PK, love shooting running bunnies!!! I can barely move my right arm, shoulder, cheek, back.

Peas on Toast said...

D-Guy - yeah...shoulder seemed too...common. ;)

Jam - it's a pulling barn my friend. If you want a quick score, and if quality isn't important, this is where you go. ;)

C - Thanks PK! I'm with you - my arm is on fire! We gotta do it again sometime.x

Hot Pink Flush said...

Clay pigeon shooting Peas?

Whatwhat, my friend? When you bring back fox hunting in red jackets, give me a yell. I say.

Peas on Toast said...

Hot pink - I know, isn't it grand?
Next time, I'm hoping it'll be overcast, so I can wear my tartan.....yeah....like the Queen. :)

boldly benny said...

I've opted to take a sabbatical from Manhats - the past few times I’ve been there it hasn't been quite right and I haven't really enjoyed myself. One of my latest new haunts... the Slap and Tackle in Greenside, a gay bar with the best 80s tunes to belt out. Okay you won't pull but if you grab a few gals (or gay boys) you are guaranteed a fun night. Oh and no one hits on you which is actually quite refreshing - boobs mean nothing!

Daedalus said...

I think you intentionally confuse us slow people ;)

Peas on Toast said...

Boldly - Yip, I did that until this last Friday. I figured I was going there way too often, and I also wasn't loving it like I used to. The Slap & Tackle sounds awesome, must definitely give it a try sometime! ;)

ChewTheCud said...

"it's a pulling barn my friend. If you want a quick score, and if quality isn't important" - so whose quality wasn't important? yours or the chick who tried to pull you?

aside from the ick though, at least now ya know ya can ;P

Antoine said...

The nice lady on the dance floor did a "tata ma chance?"

Peas on Toast said...

D-Guy - I'll give you a break, it is monday morning afterall :)

Chews - generally, and this has been my experience, the bottom-feeders that I have sucked face with there haven't always been quality. But hey. Example? THis same woman tried to pull the Ant too apparently...

Peas on Toast said...

Antoine - yip. ;)

Jam said...

I'm a little tired of pulling meaninglessness into my life. Know what I mean?

Revolving Credit said...

Nothing quite like shooting the breeze on a Sunday afternoon.

So, it sounds like you enjoyed the 'rifle thrust'??

Were you still wearing those 6-inch stilettos when shooting?
That could account for the lack of accuracy.

Peas on Toast said...

Jam - oh I hear you. Before I met Dick, I was also over it. Every now and then it's fun though - when you just want a snog and nothing else.

Rev - nope, I was all kitted out in my Pumas big guy. :) Lack of targets was because the blast is so loud I closed my eyes everytime I shot something...

Peaches said...

Gotta love good old Maneaters for a good night highlighted with supa dodgy debauchery and carcuss shaking!

Peas on Toast said...

Peaches - carcus shaking? Classic!
The maneater/manwhore/mandogs/manhunt is great...in small doses. Last year I hit that place wayyyyy too often. :)

kyknoord said...

Could this be a new look? Peas on tesTOASTarone.

Peas on Toast said...

Kyk - I always thought I'd make a great boy...ladyboy that is. :)

Suavé said...


Lookee here, I dont really have time to read up on what you been up to lately, but I just figured I'd come and drop you a line and see how you be.

I see it's that time of the blog awards again. Just so you know, I've put in a vote just for you! Whoo hoo!

Anyway, over and out

PS - Wsup Jam, D-Guy, Champ, Chewy. Ya'll doin good?

PPS - Cape Town is the shit!


Peas on Toast said...

Hello my little Suavie!

I'm sure I speak for the others as well, we miss you on this side of the country dollface! So much!

So glad to hear you're enjoying Cape Town (you know 'settling down' ha ha ;)
Thanks for your vote my dear, much much appreciated. It's going to be a tough competition this year with all these incredible blogs around.

Please blog and post some pics up of your times in CT, am dying to have a look!
Lots of hugs

Johnny Quarterback said...

how funny. I've just been having a rant about snogging and was supposed to go to the Mandog on saturday but got too hammered at the pre-party. Will have to go and test the theory there soon. just like clay-pigeon shooting hey peas - PULL!

Jam said...

Hope you're doing well!

GoDsGiMp said...

Just to reaffirm Sauve's opinion.

Yes Cape Town is the SHIT.

We even have a winning rugby team for once, tho forgive me Im really a Sharks fan.

Pete said...

Great Scott? Have you been watching Back to the future again? :)

Katie Possum said...

"mini rabbits"? sounds like terribly involved jargon. I dont know how you decode that!

Sorry, dont hate me, sarcasm is compulsory on monday mornings. So is coffee. I'm going to go have coffee and next time I comment I'll be a little ray of sunshine, promise.

Peas on Toast said...

Johnny - pull for your country my boy! ;)

Godsgimp - I enjoyed being a student down there, but to live? Not right now...:)

Pete - I thought it sounded all Ponsemby..:)

Katie - no probs. Getting into Monday has been hell for me thus far too...

Peaches said...

Tell me about it.

One too many trips to the Mandog is enough to ruin it for even the most enthused post-jaegy bomb revellers!

Must admit though that I do miss it when confronted this weekend with the DodgyMenOnHeat clubs of Brighton.