Tuesday, January 29, 2008

pearler of a purchase


Meet Basil, my blow up ladyboy. Yes, I purchased this beeyoot at Panorama Flea Market.

I even bargained the guy down from two hundred ront to a mere 150. The box says it's a Chinese Love Doll – Smell Like Real Woman. However, I only bought Basil as an Objet d'Art. He sits in the entrance hall, a-beckoning our guests. And let's face it, it's a wonderful talking point. Even for those of us who aren't boozing. On the box, it's features are described:
Full Size; Long, silky hair; Loving mouth; Strong breasts; Inviting vagina and anus.
All of those are lies, but whose counting? I'm only looking at it after all. As are you.

The other extraordinary purchase piece is this wonderful bumper sticker which is now adhered to the back of Mr 747's car. I cunningly stuck it on late last night, under cloak and dagger. He doesn't know it's there - or wait, now he does - hello my boy - how's this bad boy hey? I find this "Future Bad Boy In Transit" statement the most hilarious teenage delinquency-surfer-baby propaganda on the planet. This sticker kicks the shit of those contrived Baby On Board jobs. Mr 747 and I saw one of these on passing 'Toti last year on our Natal trip. We both found it unbelievably amusing. I never thought I'd see one again. Ah, how I was wrong. Picked up one of these beauties at Panoroma. Where else?


Hell I'm chuffed.

24 comments:

kyknoord said...

Only for "looking at"? If you say so. Still, I'd keep my camera at the ready, just in case you discover Mr 747 in flagrante delicto with Bazza.

Peas on Toast said...

So Kyk...do you think he's pretty? Bazza I mean.

GoneWithTheWind said...

I'm guessing that in your moment of sobriety, you've decided to clean out your closets and take random shots of whatever you've re-discovered, so just stop blaming the beautiful village of Panorama.

You fuck with them, you fuck with the whole trailor park.

Revolving Credit said...

With regards to that sticker that you placed on 18's car...

..Are you pregnant????

Peas on Toast said...

Wind - hahahaha. BRING IT ON! :)

Rev - nope not pregnant. But HOW FUNNY IS THIS STICKER ANNNNYWAY?

Revolving Credit said...

MMmmm...don't really find it that funny? It's OK but not legend.

So either I'm losing my sense of humour or you really need a drink??

Peas on Toast said...

See Rev - I'M HIGH ON LIFE. I FIND EVERYTHING FUNNY THESE DAYS. YOU CAN TOO, WITH SOBRIETY CLUB (PTY) LTD.

Join! I'll even send you a FREE membership badge.

PS: It's a bit of a personal joke, but it's STILL FUNNY WHEN YOU'RE HIGH ON LIFE.

Sunrise said...

The disturbing thing is that a demand exists for these type of things, do they have washing instructions? AAAGGGHHHHH

Living in KZN~not quite anything, but we can lay claim to a few things, one of is those stickers, tons of would be future bad boys whizzing around Dirtbin City...they all come from the Bluff though!

http://sunrisechipncheez.blogspot.com/

Revolving Credit said...

Once bought a friend a blowup sheep for his birthday.

If I recall correctly it was called Mutton Bone, was 'anatomically correct' and came with 'man to sheep lubricant'.

KaB said...

OMG...do those dolls come with appropriate *erm* holes?

Peas on Toast said...

sunrise - oh hell yeah. BAD BOY = DURBAN. Anywhere from Cato Ridge down and up the coast, it's bad boy overload hey. It's hilarious!

Rev - ah, the classic sheep. We had one at varsity, and one day "Ozzie Boy" mysteriously and suddenly disappeared..... Mutton Bone, ha ha ha!

Kab - yup. And she has an, erm, permeable doetpipe too. Crazy hey.

Champagne Heathen said...

My hubby did some time in Ciraldene this past Saturday with some of his raging queen mates, and he said they found a shop of porn that would make even an Oxford Lady blush - & it still has them all chuckling away - so the next time you're in search of a laugh and kitch kink....head slightly east!

Peas on Toast said...

Champs - the hubby eh? What does your new sort-of-seeing guy think of your spousal status girlie? ;)

Funny enough, was thinking of heading towards Cyrildene way this weekend...will definitely look out for the Chinese Sex Toy extravaganza!

Champagne Heathen said...

I just found out that apparently the shop's name is "Eros". Hmmm...seems the owner might not have understood the "Chinatown" idea of the suburb.

The hubby & The boy meet this week. This might be on nerve-racking par with the boy meeting my dad! The boy already thinks I'm cooked, so the pseudo-marriage status just added to the list.

So did you think he was cute?

Peas on Toast said...

Champs - don't worry, 747 knew I was cooked before he even set foot near me. And I'm fake-engaged too, so tsk tsk, aren't they lucky we're such...progressively weird kids, eh? ;)

Was the boy with you at the cricket? As in, I met the boy right?
Nice dude, you've done well!

Champagne Heathen said...

If nothing else, they'll thank us in years to come for opening up a infinitum (sp?) of alternative realities to toy with throughout life.

How is the engagement going anyway? How did the fiance feel about the sudden presence of 747?

Yup, that was the boy. You dodgy 2 were the first to meet him - don't you feel special! That also might explain my crazed nervous babbling...! It having only been Date 2 and all!

Peas on Toast said...

Champs - I think my fiance was fine with it. :)

You guys seemed chilled at the cricket, and pretty comfortable, so that's good! Glad I was one of the first to see him out in public! ha ha :)

Sunrise said...

There must be an entire market that has not tapped the camel toe doll (patent pending), comes with jocks shoved right up the there.

Peas on Toast said...

Sunrise - yeah.....um...is there a demand for camel toe dolls though, I mean.....

livingladolcevita said...

But does Basil cuddle?

The Blonde Blogshell said...

Phew...you're lucky Mr. 747 didn't think you were trying out a quirky way to tell him that : Hey! You're gonna be a dad!!

LOL...I cannot believe you bought a blow up doll! You rock!

Peas on Toast said...

Dolce - pretty much the only thing Basil can't do is cook.

I reckon he's up for mid-winter spooning, definitely.

:)

Peas on Toast said...

Blogshell -ha ha ha! "Surprise! Here's your sticker!"
Nah, some things I do reserve a little bit of sensitivity for, believe it or not. :)

Basil says howzit! :)

Nessers said...

a few years ago I bought my partner one of those blowup doll thingies as a gag valentines gift and we called her Doris. I admit she was not as pretty as yours but she did moan when, as a gag we decided to try her out, hehehe - Had not laughed so much in ages - the sound of really cheap latex squeeking is so very sexy NOT - it boggles my mind that people use them for anything other than a gag grin