Wednesday, February 04, 2009
If anyone can answer these that would be swell.
What beats a dinner involving 5 starters from 5 different countries over a bottle of red with Klo? [Not much. What a gas]
What’s better: a trip to Hong Kong or skiing through powder?
What’s better to wear to a festive wedding: a marshmallow pink frou frou dress or, like, a yellow-grey long sexy vibe elegant robe thing?
What’s worse: a bunion on your face or an allergy that affects your testicles?
What’s a better line in Friends: “But Joey you can’t use a thesaurus! What does this mean anyway? ‘The procreating hosts have great thumping aortic pumps?’ “Oh it means the parents have big hearts.” Or Ross saying “ I met the ONE. The One. Paleontologist that was hot. On the planet.”
What’s worse: being stuck behind a Chrysler Street Cruiser driving at 0.01km/hour or a Corsa Lite that jumps between lanes like someone who has a bunch of termites on acid in his pants, and both have missions in life to directly annoy the living crap out of you and only you ?
Andy Warhol or impressionist versions of Carlos Gardel?
If you had a gun to your head: Bump 2 or Bump 5?
A retainer or braces with the coloured elastics?
Work that you love so much you’ve made it your very recent number one mission to succeed in/prioritise for as long as you live, or work that is mediocre/boring as fuck, but you lead a balanced life?
An unexpected [nice] surprise or…hives? For example:
Red or pink? It’s tough one. Fuck. I’ve been struggling for years with this one. Years.
The Beach scene where they’re swimming across to Phi Phi and they pretend that he gets eaten by a shark, or the scene where they jump off the waterfall? Fuck. What a toughie. The music is very important in both scenes, both the same, both incredible.
Stuart Townsend or Ashton Kutcher [before he opened his mouth]?
Berlin or New York?
Cardiovascular gym or [advanced, ok ok, erm, stage 2] hip hop lessons?
A new home entertainment theatre system with flat screen TV, or a trip? [Bearing in mind you can take a no expenses trip from your couch on a wide screen television if you have DStv.] But can you make mates? A ha! [Rewiring the bastard must be inclusive of deal.]
A really really exciting Saturday night sojourn in a wine farm in the Cape, or like, Movida?
A bath with pomegranate oil or, a bath with pomegranate oil and a glass of wine?
Never hearing Usher’s vocal chords again or a possible repeated on-the-whim-what-the-hell-jesus-there-goes-my-credit-limit trip to Rio de Janeiro?