Friday, October 29, 2010

clocks going back

The weekend I've been dreading since moving to Britain has arrived.

Make no mistake, I'm back in the land of crumpets, Downing Street, normal sized-portions, and am very happy to be home.

Save for one little annoyance.
On Sunday evening the clocks go back an hour. We lose an hour of daylight.

As a South African, I've dreaded this day since I arrived in July.

This officially signifies the official end of the British summer. This alone is ridonkulous, because the British summer is a distant memory. I no longer sit in my garden to drink my tea, if you get my drift.

My question is why? Who thought it would be a good idea to make winter even more dark than it already is? To shut off natural light by making sure the sun sets even earlier than normal - "I say Barnaby, let's gently fuck with everyone."

I don't know who Barnaby is, or who I quoted above. I'm just thinking of a pompous dicktard who made the Clock Moving law.

I've been fearing the experience of a full English winter, and the clock change is at the pinnacle of this fear. As my gay friend says, "Who needs a period when you have seasonal depression?"

(You don't get a period dude. You may be a bitch, but biologically speaking, you're still a guy.)

When the clocks turn back, everything is but shrouded in darkness. One would think Britain sits on the polar caps, but from Monday morning onwards I'll be arriving and leaving work in the dark.

Good times. If you sleep in a coffin and come out to drink blood from a human throat.

My colleague put the fear of God into me when he said, Basically Peas, you won't see light from now until March.

Another mate said to me when I arrived back from San Francisco, and I was commenting on the grey and drizzle in between reverse-jetlag, "You ain't seen nothing yet. It's about to get a whole lot worse."

Is it really that bad? But really though?

I'm a good hibernator. I can really knuckle down and lie on the couch in my pj's if I need to. I can embrace home-dwellage like a queen. I did it back in South Africa with particular panache.

But until March?

PS: I'm jetlagged to boot. I want to cry a little and then stuff my face with crumpets.


Robyn Silverstone said...

Yep. It's pretty much how you described it. They fun part is when you leave work at 5 and it's already pitch black at 3pm. The cold is the worst but as long as you keep yourself busy with drinks after work, go to the movies, theatre and retail therapy, it semi numbs the pain. And try not to look at your friends status updates of 'it's so hot' or 'Cape Town is magnificent' as you may want to throw yourself into the Thames

Peas on Toast said...

Robyn, I have SO scared for that 3pm midnight blackness when I'm still sitting at work with three hours to go.

Farkkkkk, and as you say the status updates about how sunny and insane SA is, how am I going to cope?

Eat. That's how. What else can one do?!

Robyn Silverstone said...

Eat in moderation. My friends and I fres'd Golders Green / Hampstead silly during winter last year and now I'm sitting in Cape Town with my London pudding, trying desperately to lose the weight.

I worked right opposite Victoria station and there are some perler pubs to frequent if you're around there or in Pimlico. They make it a little better.

Re the status updates: always have a comeback like: "I'm off to Ireland for the weekend to watch the Bokke" or "I just decided to go to Paris for the weekend. Eurostar rates were ridiculously cheap" There's a reason why you're there. Keep that in sight and follow it.

Peas on Toast said...

Robyn you're a queen. Brilliant advice, and LOVE the status update status quo.
Wait till it snows, I'll pack it on:'Off to Prague for mulled wine in the snow......' :) Am I allowed to lie?! ;)

I work opposite Victoria station too. And have to agree, some quality gastro pubs near there, all very quaint, especially on Ebury Street.

Sigh. Now to find some night vision goggles!

Robyn Silverstone said...

I worked next door to Google so the hidden gems in the area:

* The Green Cafe - on the corner of Starbucks road by the Post Office
* The Elusive Camel - great coctails. Right near Giraffe (semi SA owned restaurant)
* The Victoria pub - Lower Belgrave street
* St George's Tavern - Eccleston bridge
* DimT - Wilton street - opp the Sainsburys
* Caramel - Wilton street. A great little restaurant
* The Chocolate Society - off the back of Belgravia. Elizabeth street
* The Ebury - for a special evening which is on the way to the Chelsea Bridge

Roads courtesy of Google maps ;) and good times have been held at all those places. There were smurfs at the St Georges Tavern, got fat at the Chocolate Society, Green Cafe I ate the ginormous Tuna baked potato and salad, DimT is a banker for good food and the Elusive Camel was where I had my work farewell drinks and a sore head on most ocassions