Friday, August 05, 2011

the lucky three

Those are enormous pants, Jones.

I have lost almost 3 kilos.

WeightWatchers might make me sweat like a euro in a Greek bank, but it's actually fucking working.

Yes I'm starving all the time, yes I weigh myself more than what is probably necessary, yes I drink water and eat air, but I've also had Italygate and 1000 Carbonaras in between.

It's slowly but surely working. Even if I am sweating like Pierre Dukan in a bakery.

Only 8 weeks to go until I get to the weight I was in varsity. Can you even imagine that for two and a half seconds? Well, no, you probably can't because you probably haven't seen me in real life, but whatever - I'm battling to fathom it.

(Obviously, if all carries on according to plan yadda yadda).

This doesn't mean I don't think about Belgian chocolate cake and pies all the time.

I do. I fucking do.

It makes me sweat like Margaret Thatcher trapped inside a socialist's basement.

But it's Friday. So that means I eat salad, fruit, air and water until 6pm until I can go to the pub and have a slice of pizza and a few glasses of wine.

Jesus. Sweating on a boat on the sea of Galilee.

The excitement of sinking my molars into an oozing mozzarella fried thing makes me want to start sweating like a paedophile in a school yard.

It's the small joys. That make me sweat like a vegan in a KFC.

Air tastes great if you squeeze a fresh lime in it, FYI.

Even if it makes you sweat like OJ Simpson standing trial for murder in Texas.


Flarkit said...

I bow to thy uber-impressive willpower. Teach me, oh loser-of-weight, so that I too can be satisfied by just one slice of the mighty pizza, instead of the 4 I shall be probably consume tonight...

Peas on Toast said...

Flarkit - it's torture, I won't pretend it isn't. I've only been guided along with the knowledege that each week I seem to be losing about a kilo.

I can't stand near pizza or anything remotely nice because I start wailing and or wanting to smash the whole thing in my face.

It's horrible and hard. But WW puts me on this 'points' system, so I have to adhere to the points. And by some force of nature, I'm managing to do this.

Clean Camel Urine said...

Have you tried an Epsom Salts sitz bath for your Farmer Giles? My Gran swears by them...

The Chantal said...

"sweating like a euro in a greek bank" HAH HAH HAH, that was awesome.

I've looked at your pics and you are slim, but anyways cool for the 3kg :) I myself have suddenly lost weight over the past few weeks and am loving it, wasnt planned but apparently stress is the way to go if you need to lose weight lol, I'm lighter than I was in matric, weeee. bye bye boobies a bit though :/ oh well :P