Monday, August 22, 2005

arrogance

I was quite revolting on Friday night. Although I was feeling completely normal albeit not-sober, and not particularly intense about anything, I was being completely over-the-top arrogant.

It was all tongue in cheek, of course, but still this is what happened:

L: Greg, you are totally in love with aren't you? (Gasp?)
Greg: Huh?
L: I've known it for months. It's ok, I'm not going to tell anyone.
Greg: I'm not in love with you, I just...
L: Oh yes you are.
Greg: Um, no I'm not.
L: You totally are!
Greg: Maybe I like you a little
L:huh? (caught off guard) ...ok so that means you love me?
Greg: No.

And so it went. Where the hell was I getting that from? The tequila perhaps? No, no, not that either. I've entered a new phse, because sober as a judge, I e-mail my other friend Nick and say, "I know that you are totally head over heels in love with me. But don't worry. Your secret's safe with me." Luckily he laughed. Luckily he just told me that actually I'm confused and I am in love with him. But how many more creatures have to bear the brunt of my new you-totally-dig-me phase? It's not like I think they do either. I think it's funny.

But it so isn't. Maybe I should just go back to groping ass.

137 comments:

November Rain said...

lol.....
hey grabbing hi-ni s isnt bad
(maybe I need to start an AAA - Ass addiction association)

Paperslut said...

I've tried exactly the same thing, with mixed results obviously. Patriarchal society is a bitch... but we live with what we have. Hence, I will be satisfied with 3 you-read-my-mind-perfectlys even if it does entail 1 (or 2) (or 3)stfu-morons.

Ps. Recommended listening right now is Aqualung. Do try.

Better Safe Than Sorry said...

groping ass is good!
i say enjoy your new phase, who knows what's going to happen next.

Nettie said...

Did your tag babe!

Peas on Toast said...

November Rain - hi! Can I join the AAA? ("Hi my name is Laurian...(Hi Laurian)...I have been addicted to groping ass for three years. I've been clean for two days." (cue clapping)

Wonderwall - hey! Aqualung eh? Will do. And yes patrirachal society is a bitch: ladies arejust not meant to grope ass. But why??

Janie - agreed, it's a therapy :)

Nettie - took a look, loved the answers!

Ed Abbey said...

It was probably implanted into your head by the hypnotist.

Peas on Toast said...

Ed - "You will think that everybody is in love with you."

Works for me. At least I don't think I'm a chicken or something :)

November Rain said...

sure lol :)laurian
"Hi my name is November some just call me Novy...(Hi Novy)...and I need help... It started innocently when I was a kid my mom was always chasing me around after my bath singing I see a hi-ni all nice and shiny if you dont hide it I am going to bite it... (let it all out Novy)However I became a teen and hi-nis had a whole new meaning for me... Now my hands have minds of thier own I cant keep off my hubby's hi-ni (DD stands up hi I am DD Novy's hubby and her hand is groping my ass again) I am addicted (cue supportive claps)


lol

Peas on Toast said...

Novy-cue my boyfriend.."The problem is that she doesn't only grope MY ass. She gropes everybody's, especially after a couple of drinks down at the pub."
laurian: "But honey, you know that your ass is the best in the business."
Boyfriend, "Sure...but still you have a problem."
Me: "I know, that's why we're here together."
Cue whoops and claps and blushes from me and boyfriend.

November Rain said...

laurian --
DD stands up I know what ya mean. The thing is Novy has 2 hands and grabbs ass with both hands on any asses around. then she denies it
Novy looks around innocently I do not grab other peeps ass
DD looks at Novy
and sometimes she grabs at the guys ass and he turns and looks at me if I did it
what am I suppose to say?
Novy stands well that is only because he wont let me grab his ass

DD continues I have tried putting her hands on her asses but she isnt happy with groping her ass

novy because his ass is much more cushy and tushy
DD clears his throat

Novy okay I have a hi-ni fetish I admit it

(looks like we are making a break through)

Blog ho said...

i'm totally in love with you

November Rain said...

http://hi-ni.blogspot.com/

for you :P Laurian

Peas on Toast said...

Ho-I thought so. I've been suspiscious of your feelings for me for months. But it's ok...because...I am totally in love with you too.

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