I did the mid-week piss up again. Do we EVER learn? I'm sitting shivering at my desk, hugging a giant Coke-a-Cola and contemplating the events that occured not more than 6 hours ago:
1) Too much jagermeister
2) My red hooker lipstick ended up on everybody's faces, including Nick's and Tim's.
3) Tim wedgied Nick so bad, he lietrally snapped his jock strap.
4) As a result, Nick's jocks are hanging from a flagpole on 4th Avenue.
5) I saw the fellow school peer with the mullet again.
6) Apparently I would make a great Qantas air hostess called...Tracie.
7) Louise kissed Nick.
8) Then she got sick in the bathroom.
9) Then Nick drove her home
10) Who's this supposed Ex of mine? And why is he hopelessly and utterly in love with me?
11) jagermeister sure gives me gas.