I have a serious problem with our metro police department. Besides our tax bureau and our government, I have never come across so many incompetent humans in my life.
On the day of my accident, they arrives at the scene of the crash, and preceeded to just sit in their car, watching from a distance, like I was the main character of a really boring play. So, eventually I walked up to them and asked them to take my statement. One rolled his eyes. I shit you not, he actually did that. With the effort of a pregnant elephant, he finally got out of his car and did the statement thing.
Then he fucking cross-examined me. Not in the light of "just to make sure of the finer details," but because he seemed skeptical that I had slammed on brakes.
Me: Do you think I would purposefully ram into a taxi?
Cop: Don't put words in my mouth.
Me: Huh? You just asked me where my skidmarks are! I don't know, I have ABS brakes!
Cop: Well why aren't there any skidmarks?
Me: How the fuck should I know?
And so it went. Then he spoke in hushed tones in Zulu to the taxi driver. How to irritate me: speak in a langiage I don't understand about me in front of me. He wouldn't tell me if the taxi driver had given an opposing statement to mine.
I phone the cop department in town the next day for my case number. I phone them eight times a day until this morning when I finally get it. You see, they just neglected to put it into the computer system until they felt like it. I asked them if I could phone this cop directly to ask him where the hell my case number is, and I got: "He's not doing his job. But I have no time to give you his number either."
Then, one follows me in his car for two kilometres, which I failed to notice until he put his lights on and pulled me aside. Why? What had I done wrong?
"You are holding your cell phone."
Not talking on it, not even holding it above my shoulders, just kinda holding it. And he followed me for two kms to try and fine me R500. "Don't you have more pressing things to do, like find people holding guns or something?" Then he tried to bribe me and fine me on the spot.
Sometimes I think I'm living on the wrong continent. Some people deal with the slow and corrupt pace of Africa pretty easily. I do not.