Saturday, January 28, 2006

the tragedy of life

And for once, it’s not my tragedy, indirectly.

Since last year, one of my guy friends decided he quite liked me. During my single periods, we’d snog every now and then, but as much as I love him to pieces, I’m not attracted to him to warrant anything more. The snogging ceased last year.

To other women, this man is hot stuff. He is bright, charming, good looking, well-educated, has a good solid career with a large insurance company, is very well-off and is fun. So he poured his heart out to me a couple of months ago, expressing his feelings that I simply cannot and will not return. We remain good friends though.

When I hooked up with Small Bum, he became jealous and elusive and told me he needed a month break of no contact. I agreed. He seems better, but I still get the same vibes and chirps every now and then. He purposefully calls Small Bum anything but his real name. "How is John?" (His name is Dave.) "Have you seen Luke lately?" (No I haven't seen Dave lately.)

In the meantime, there is a common friend that is completely in love with him and would do anything for him. She’s American, from a very high profile family, is stinking rich, is Princeton educated, lives in a mansion, and on top of that is a sweet, sweet girl. But as he once said, “My life would be so easy. If only I could fall in love with her.” And he can’t. So here’s a girl who knows how he feels about average little old me, and still is willing to do anything and everything for him, even though she’s well sought after by gold diggers.And she knows how he really feels.

They got together again, as they do randomly, the other night. She said to him, “You lighten up around (Peas), I know you love her, but that’s ok.” They kissed once and he went home.

Life is fuuucked up.

It’s crazy. But what can one do? As the French say, “Life eez sheet. Deal weeth eet.”


zuzula said...

oh god, that's so sad. It happens a lot though I spent years being in love with a friend who didn't feel the same way. And I have another friend who would give me the world if only I could let him. ah - l'amour.....

Billy said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Billy said...

You always want what you cant have!
The story of my life.

Stephanie said...

Life is fucked up. I've been on both sides of the fence and it ain't fun.

Peas on Toast said...

Yip it seems that most people have been on each side of the fence at one time or another. It sucks. It sucks indeed :(