Some of you may have read this on Ant’s blog, but for the misinformed, Small Bum and I had a discussion about 'pearl necklacing' over the weekend. It went as such:
Me: Ever done a pearl necklace?
SB: No, was never that intimate with my previous shags. You?
Me: Yes I have. Wanna do it?
Me: But you have to, you know, do it between my boobies.
SB: That's not a pearl necklace! That's a...titty fuck.
Me: Titty fuck? Dirty talk I can do, derogatory talk I cannot, dude face.
SB: OK then...a Booby Boof?
Me: Better. So can we do it sometime?
SB: Sure, how about next week?
Me: Suits me fine.
I'll keep you posted.
I love that I have slept with less people than he has yet seem to have done more experimental stuff. I’m playing the teacher role at the moment, and I rather like it.
Before meeting yours truly, he had never tried out my favourite position before. I’m thinking he was a missionary man for the most part. My favourite position basically involves a tangle of arms and legs, me sitting on top of him on the edge of a hard surface. The Edgy Cock A Doodle Do if you will. It doesn’t involve cranium-bending creativity. Some of the best sexual positions are the most simple.
To do this week:
- Indulge in a pearl necklace.
- Buy Jenna Jameson’s How to Make Love Like a Porn Star from Exclusive Books. (Who’ll be begging for it now, huh? ;)
- Burn my ex S’s accounting textbooks that I found at the bottom of the linen cupboard.
- Attend Blog Awards on Thursday evening with Third World Ant.
- Attend Oppenheimer birthday party on Friday at booked-out club in Rosebank.
- Chill the fuck out about ex S and Booby Bitch.