Friday, March 24, 2006

tourist

At 4:30pm yesterday, I left my office, with a backpack from my overnight stay at Small Bum's the previous night, and walked to Norwood to wait for Third World Ant to pick me up.

I really felt like a tourist in my own town.
I looked like one, firstly. I knew where I was going, and realised that we actually have a bus service. Which stops almost outside our flat. But this concept is as foriegn to me here as it would be in, say, Bucharest.
Immediately self-conscious at the thought of getting into the bus and asking how much a ticket was, and where the bus was actually going.
Especially because I looked so bloody pitiful, with my rucksack and metallic shoes.

Never before have I actually sat on Grant Avenue, sipping on coffee, waiting to be picked up. Usually I can leave whenever I like. It was cold and misty, and I kept on flashing back to April last year when I travelled Europe on my own. Even the waitress that usually serves me here looked at me funny.

Paranoia perhaps?
And for the rest of the evening, once home, I still felt strange. Seeing my town in a totally new light.
To rectify this feeling of wierdness, I pulled out my trusty Bushwacker 3 000 and made happy with it.

Still didn't help. Was worried that Third World Ant's sister, who is staying with us at the moment, could hear it.

Paranoia.

I wake up this morning to an sms from [fuckhead] Ex S. Since the unravelling of my blog and his banging of a close family friend, we have not conversed. He says he misses me and "can we meet to talk about all of this?"
He only misses me because he has been in Cape Town, our city, and because he's a fuckhead. Am shaking.

17 comments:

Jam said...

Take a deep breath...

And then -

Enjoy the fact that you have an opportunity to look at JHB in a new light, especially since it can get so stale sometimes!

Then -

SMS back the ex and tell him to vanish. Because you broke up for a reason in the first place and it was probably a very good one!

Good luck, and many hugs.

Peas on Toast said...

Thanks Jam :)
Yip it was bizarre, surreal almost, looking at your city like a foreigner. Especially a place that I go to all the time. As for Ex S, I replied:
"Also thought about you alot. Along the lines of how hypocritical you are, how you are banging away at [Booby Bitch], and how I actually don't want to see you right now."

Still shaking. Still shaking.

Marc said...

I know....I think you should bash the ex over the head with the Bushwacker 3 000, that ought to sort him out.

Peas on Toast said...

Marc - he may just get the message huh? :)

Third World Ant said...

Crumbs! The nerve... but be strong, don't see him now, not yet.

As for the Bushwacker, my sis is vaguely hard of hearing, you'd be fine. I think she may have stolen my Flick the G from my parents' home too, so it's not like she doesn't have one of her own!

Peas on Toast said...

Ant you were a lifesaver yesterday. I was feeling so bloody sorry for myself and so out of sorts - seeing your little car pull up outside the Steers was the best thing ever! :)

I'm sure the Bushwhacker was louder than it usually was last night. It just seemed to...hum more. If that makes sense.
Have you asked your sis if she knows of Rick the G's whereabouts?

sheldon said...

Alternatives are essential for good perspective.

I took my car in for a service yesterday. The courtesy guy in the courtesy car wasn’t giving me the courtesy call about my courtesy lift so I decided to take a taxi after work to the dealer. For 5 za rond you can get from Fourways to Randburg, I hopped on at Sloane Street. I’m happy to say that the driver didn’t try to make change with another taxi… at 57kph or do anything else crazy that I’ve seen happen. So it was refreshing, interesting and even humbling. Hope your alternate afternoon was all these things too.

Peas on Toast said...

Nice Sheldon! For once a happily ever after ending concerning a taxi! I really should've pulled my sorry ass together and done the same. You're a helluva lot braver than I am. :)

Anonymous said...

shake shake - been reading your blog for the last week or 2 and read some archives... congrats on blogaward.

Also had shaky experience with ex yesterday... why do they love to push your buttons...
think i need a bushwacker to wack him over the head with...

Peas on Toast said...

Thanks Anon.

I think Ex's will always press buttons. I reckon that if they have the ability to affect us, then undoubtedly we are affecting them too.

PS: You can buy the Bushwhacker in various colours at Adult World for a mere R200. Mine is hot pink.

Jam said...

And mine is blue. A bit alien really. I think pink is probably more friendly.

funkzar said...

never walk the same road twice in relationships.

Wash your hands clean of Ex S and apply rule # 6: Get over yourself.

As for transport and busses as such, they have a website which is FAIRLY accurate.

http://www.joburgmetrobus.co.za/

Just don't rely too much on it.

Ta

zuzula said...

I think you should enjoy having the upper hand. HE misses YOU. and you don't care because you've got a hot new boyfriend! excellent.

I was looking for my driving license the other night (still have no idea where i've stashed it) and found an old diary entry scribbled on the back of a bit of paper (i'd forgotten what life was like, pre-blog).

I'd written that my big ex had come to see me at work, kissed me and asked whether we could get back together. and I'd said no but was v shaky about it. Felt belatedly proud of myself for not going back to the idiot - and you should too! x

Anonymous said...

thanks peas and jam - good colour selection.

good to realise he's feeling something too I suppose.

Kind of feel like I have to put part of my social life on hold - the part that is involved with his set of friends... its such a bugger when one of your best mates has started dating one of your ex's mate (well they started before we broke up) OH WELL... i'm in cape town so just need to make loads more friends

Anonymous said...

thanks peas and jam - good colour selection.

good to realise he's feeling something too I suppose.

Kind of feel like I have to put part of my social life on hold - the part that is involved with his set of friends... its such a bugger when one of your best mates has started dating one of your ex's mate (well they started before we broke up) OH WELL... i'm in cape town so just need to make loads more friends

Jam said...

It's easier than you think anonymous- pick up the phone and call all of those people you haven't spoken to for years! And get some space...

Peas on Toast said...

Anon - if it helps, I may or may not be in your situation in the future. One of my best mates introduced me to Small Bum. And she's going out with his best mate.
Could be tricky.