Saturday, August 12, 2006

the nick names we call each other

My parents call me Boo. Did on Sports Day when I ran a relay, did at school in front of my friends and teachers, and still do now. Guys tend to reap nick names more than chicks, and we had a discussion the other day at Zoo Lake over some of the most ridiculous and disgusting names some of these poor bastards have been stuck with, since school and such.
Herewith a list of nick names I have come across and heard of to date. Bear in mind, these are actual people’s names: (Thanks to the Michaelhouse boys, C and a couple of others for their input:)

Guns (As in big biceps)

Tripod Stand (I went out with Tripod Stand in Matric. He was rather absurdly large.)
Meat (Trousersnake)
Inyoka (Trousersnake)
Baby (“Nobody sticks Baby in a corner.” Whatever you say, Patrick Swayze.)
Poen (Punani. Has a great ring to it, dontchathink?)
Trunko (skinny legs and calves)
ProVita (As in the monks in the biscuit advert- when you have a hair cut that looks like a bowl has been put on your head and cut around.)

Headgirl (As in gives a lot of head)
Jaw Bone
Meatloaf (Big knob)
Diri (A mate and I call each other this. Because one of us had a severe case of the shits back at varsity. Random, yet sensational.)
Uniongay’s Sister
Baksteen/Brick (As in thick as a ?)

Off the charts:
Chunder (“Mum, dad…meet my new boyfriend Chunder.”)
Tampon (His surname somehow related to tampons)
Muff (Again, surname-related)
Cotch. (Like Chunder)

(Except for Tampon – take a wild stab at where the ‘Off the Charts’ people went to varsity? Yep. Rhodes written all over it. Hilarious.)

PS: The Ant informed me that her boyfriend The Gilb is currently compiling a Pornalike of all his mates. That is, porn stars that look like his mates, which he'll plaster to his wall. My pornalike is naked with her finger up her cookie. J's is sucking on a large knob. He has yet to find The Ant's, but I'm sure she's lurking on the pages of FHM somewhere. Bless.

PPS: Small Bum and I are mates. After argiung loudly, then talkign through all our shit, we have decided to bury the hatchet. You won't hear me speak about him again on this blog.

PPPS: It's frikking Friday baby!


R.Allones said...

Ramone Allones, hero of the revolution rides again... hah hah!


Peas on Toast said...


Jam said...

So what's your most common nickname, Peas?
Glad to hear the SB thing worked out.
Me,I'm off to the bush for a weekend.
Bring on Friday afternoon!

kyknoord said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
kyknoord said...

"Rickets" is one of the funniest nicknames I've ever heard.
P.S. I hope you didn't bury the hatchet in his skull, otherwise you might have to rename this blog to The Adventures of PrisonBoo.

Peas on Toast said...

Jam - enjoy the bush sweetheart! YOu lucky thing!
I'd have to admit that 'Peas' has usurped Boo in recent times. :)

Kyknoord - isn't it hilarious? Good old Rickety. ;)
PS: The Adventures of PrisonBoo. Love it!

Antoine said...

My nickame - Hop as in (H)ooked (O)n (P)ussy ;)

Whoo hooo - Friday - only three more work days until the new week starts! I need a life demmet!

Peas on Toast said...

Wow...Antoine....nice...I guess! The chicks wouldn't know it either, just your mates. Bless. ;)

tyler said...

Ah yes - Tampon (Real surname Linnet...sounds like do the math).
Although his nickname did change in the last year of varsity. His car had an unlucky meeting with a tree and he had to have part of his colon removed in an operation. From then onwards he was affectionately known as Semi Colon

Peas on Toast said...

Tyler, you're kidding! Shiza, haven't seen the guy since I graduated, hope he's ok??

Well even so Semi Colon has to be better than Tampon.

JamesW said...

Tyler? who be that?
hahaha, forgot about the colon thing. His first name was Chris, was it not?

Peas on Toast said...

Never met a Tyler either, but did know Tamponius. :)

Tyler said...

Yep Jimmy - it was Chris. And even though he hated being called Tampon (who wouldn't??) he didn't really make a fuss of it. Last I heard he was working in the exciting world of accounting! Wow! With numbers and everything!

Phil said...

Oi! lets leave off with the accountant abuse please....I am sure Semi Colon is having a bran time!

Have a cool friday and weekend all and Sundry.

Talking of Colons - Peas I missed you at the COLONY last night

muddlepuddle said...

My best mate had a girlfriend whom everyone knows only as Blowbo. Nobody actually knows her real name like seriously. Once someone referred to her as something else and nobody including her had a clue who they were talking to!
But boy speaking of thick bricks - she was so dumb!

During a game of 30 seconds she thought the Statue of Liberty was in Paris - doh!!

Shew was I gald when Sausage and Blowbo broke up!

Man alive!

muddlepuddle said...

ooops mean glad

Peas on Toast said...

Phil - You went to the Colon you lucky, lucky man! ;) Hope you belted out some karaoke over a few John Deeres!

Muddle - Blowbo and Sausage dating. That is pretty darn funny. :)
Baksteen Blowbo. Bless.

Phil said...

Mate of mine dated a chick we called "WYSIWYG" - what you see is what you get - cause she was EXACTLY as thick as she looked

Phil said...

No Karoake at Colon Thursday nights THANK GOD - you do not want to hear me belting out anything! Promise.

They had a quiz which was fun and it was a mexican sort of evening with some pretty fine mexican food as well.

AND I got home in a reasonable state whish is always nice!

zuzula said...

Classic! Hardly anybody calls me by my real name (although it's very short and sweet) - zuzula is my parents' nickname for me. Even my boss has invented his own term of endearment for me - Madame Zee. Hmmm.

fly said...

fly...everybody calls me fly...dammit...

Phil said...

Peas forgive me but I always thought a John Deere was a tractor!

Are you referring to Jack Russel - also known as Daniels in some circles?

Peas on Toast said...

Phil - lol! John Deere is a tractor. And, and! Cane and cream soda, a Colony trademark. :)

Glad you made it back in one piece, usually after the Colony I'm a mess. :)

Madame Zee - bless. Sometimes I think my boss forgets my name. ;)

Fly - I knew another Fly but seriously.

JamesW said...

Yeah, i'm one of those, where most people wouldnt know me by my real name.

Phil said...

Cane and Cream Soda - got to try that sometime. Probably cheaper than my standard wubble wodka red wool.

Nah I was good - for a major change.

Have you seen the chick there that brings her damn cat / kitten to the pub?

Not well!

Revolving Credit said...

Helmut, that is so sad - you go all the way to the Colony and all you can do is to critise some poor chicks pussy....ha,ha,ha

Peas on Toast said...

Phil - I can't remember seeing any cats at the Colony. Plenty of pussy, but no cats. :)
Can't believe I just said that.

Rev - LOL. You'd love the Colony. Fit in there like a glove my dear. :)

Anonymous said...

Sorry. I realise it may appear ungrateful but I promise it had four paws, a tail and more fur than ANY pussy I have ever seen!!!!



Tyler said...

This is probably not what you want to hear, but there is actually a Statue of Liberty in Paris. It's a replica of the original (that the French gave to the US originally) and its on its own little island called Pont de Grenelle in the Seine! Maybe she wasn't as dumb as you thought?

Revolving Credit said...

..but did you make it purrrrrr!

Phil said...

Nope. Although I did play with it and she was sure it like me but one never really can tell with pussy.........or bees (said Pooh)

Champagne Heathen said...

You made the Statue of Liberty purr. Man, you definitely know your way around women! Can I give you my number??! ...nothing like picking up on the ends of conversations!

Peas on Toast said...

This is what I love about a place like The Knee/Colon.

People bring their cats in for a cane and cream soda.
I just hope when I'm still a spinster at 45, I won't be bringing all 32 of my pussies to the Colony Arms.
Tyler - I hate replicas. They're just so...tacky.

Peas on Toast said...

Champs - looks like Helmut-o-Phil is becoming a Colon regular.

I'll see you two on the karaoke stand.

Phil said...

BRILLIANT - ALL of you. Must run now - bloack beauty car needs new speaker and Honda messing me around

Revolving Credit said...

If Helmut visits the Colon less frequently, does that make him a 'SEMI-COLON' too?

Champagne Heathen said...

Peas - if I am still standing by Colony hour, considering tomorrow's plans...I'll see you there! Although, I am not sure whose the winner and whose the loser if I get up and sing in public - we might ALL be losers! Helmut, get that german accent tromboning!

Peas on Toast said...

Rev - yes, perhaps Helmut and Tampon have more in common than they realise. :)

Champs - I'm with you there. The chances of me making Colony after tomorrow afternoon's plans are extremely thin.

The Tart said...

Was once called Doodle Snicker Doodle ... this from a very quiet-silent type of dude. I miss him. ; /
I called him Bunnyman ... in public ... got in trouble for that ... but the fun kinda trouble.

Plan to save your list for the next BF. Must scout out next nickname victim this weekend!!!

The Tart

Inyoka said...


Inyoka said...

We had a guy at boarding school who had a high voice. His nickname? Testicle.

Humans are very cruel.

Anonymous said...

Whats wrong with trailer, small bum is going to get his ass kicked by me ha ha.. It also rhymes with my surname

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