There are two kinds of people in this world.
The nice and the nasty.
Classic example of the nasty: The editor (who is out to destroy me), has gone and adopted a cat. This should be a charitable gesture if it didn't mean everyone else has to look after it.
I don't like cats. And cats don't like me. Please, God, explain why I am the person who has to dash off to Engen Hillbrow during lunch to buy it fucking Whiskas Choona Chunks? Am I now adding cat food as a prime criterion in my monthly expenditure? It would appear so.
I don't look at this cat, and it runs away when it sees me, so this is the most usless pet I have ever had to nourish in my entire life. Plus I already have a pet.
Classic example of the nice: The tin of Whiskas Choona Chunks, which I have gone into Hillbrow for, as there are no other convenience stores selling this particular brand of cat food - is R12.99. I have Ten Ront on me.
An angel appears from the heavens (actually he appears from a white Toyota Corolla), steps through the automatic doors and hands me three extra rand.
"No no," I protest, "I will just whack it onto my card."
'I insist' he says. Smiles at me, I smile back and I pay for the Choona Chunks.
What a nice man, what a gesture! In a world filled with greed and neglectful cat owners that make their deputy editors run off to buy food.
There is still kindness in this cruel place afterall.
I smiled braadly at him, wave and then...caught a glimpse of my teeth in the rearview mirror.
Beautiful really. If a piece of yellow Dorito caught between one's incisors is your thing.