Friday, October 26, 2007

the cheese platter

Haven't been cheesy in a while (or have I?), but it's nice to talk about lovey stuff when you've spoken about so many cynical and heartsore moments in the past.

Cheesiness once in a while warms the cockles. Cynical stuff makes my heart go hard and I get depressed. So while in the moment – let's talk cheesy. Also it's Friday. And after a long week, my brain hurts.

Relationships aren't easy things, as idealistic as they are. They take work, compromise, sacrifice, compassion, communication and a lot of love. The latter is what it's all worth working for. Love doesn't happen everyday to everybody – hell, it saddens me to know that there are some people in the world who'll never experience love at all.

It hurts like a bitch too – but love really is an incredible thing. That you can take two people, in any one place who will meet, and 9 times out of 10 never speak again. The one odd – the one – is that the two actually connect there and then. Maybe a tenth of an odd that they'll actually fall in love. A twentieth of a chance thereafter – will the love last, will the two be compatible forever after? Will they be able to ride the storms? If they can – like 80-year couples who are still together – then wow. It's very rare these days. But not impossible. Which is why even though I am tormented by constant hang-ups, I know they can be softened. I am in love after all. And that is what makes life whole.

It's worth the risk if it brings happiness, right?

Shit this is cheesy.

Anyway, there are things I love about a relationship or being close to someone. End-of-the-day phonecalls, emails while you work, having someone's feet touching yours at the end of the bed, kissing and all the physical stuff, and sharing personal jokes.
Laughter is so important – I've heard that from lots of people lately. “We're doing great, we laugh at each other all the time,” or “Thank God she makes me laugh.” Or even, “He actually laughs at my pirate joke, no one has done that before.” That kind of crap. Laughter is a big one.

Love is also for the brave. You have to open up, you can't not. (Usually I find it hard to hold it all in – but I'm more cautious now.) If you don't open up, you don't experience it full-throttle. And what's the point doing it in half-measures?

It may leave a big gaping wound if it ends though, which will make the room spin, and you'll want to vomit and you'll cry for a while and drink shitloads of alcohol, but it's all worth it.

Right, no more Lionel Richie for me.

PS: I mean Lionel Richie and a glass of wine.

49 comments:

Mel said...

Being in love is wonderful isn't it? I still can't get over seeing the look in my fiance's eyes - a mixture of adoration and disbelief, like he's saying "I can't believe she's mine!" *sigh* Get's me everytime! :)

Peas on Toast said...

Mel - wow, that is awesome! Congrats on your engagement, you sound very happy my dear. And he sounds super special too. :) xx

Champagne Heathen said...

Aaah, that is too sweet. It's great to see you gushing! And I am really happy that you two are so happy & cheesy and all.

It does make me chuckle that if ever there was a case of your next guy/ girl actually being right in front of you, you just can't see it yet....!

All the best to the both of you on it!

Peas on Toast said...

Shot dollface!

And guess what? IT'S FRIDAY! :)

KaB said...

*sigh*

I want to be able to laugh with someone again...

Nah, maybe later...loving the single life!

Nice post...made me all squishy inside!

:)

Peas on Toast said...

Thanks Kab!

And yes, the single life is filled with laughs too. Absolutely. :)

boldly benny said...

*smiles* I loved this. Love is the most dizzying high but as you say it takes a lot of courage to open yourself up, especially after your heart has been through the trenches.

Other love highs:
His arms around you.

Dorky smiling at each other.

Have a fantastic Friday ;-)

Peas on Toast said...

Boldly - yes indeed!

And yeah, it's tough to open up when you've been broken so many times before. I've justified it by compartmentalising my heart. Like one corner has been fucked up before, but there is still a section that is naive and open to (possibly more heartache...)

OK, I will not panic.

Peas on Toast said...

Fuck.

Revolving Credit said...

Luckly I drank a fair amount of red wine last night.

After that and reading your post, it does feel like I've been to a cheese & wine!

Sweetass RSA said...

i once read this somewhere:

laughter is the way to true happiness...

true...ahhhhhhhhhhh...were all soppy and cheesy today...ahhhhhhhhh... :-)

Peas on Toast said...

Rev - perhaps I should add some whine with my cheese. :)

I'm way too perky today. But it's only cos it's Friday. :)

Sweetass - I got a load of Catherine Tait last night. It works. No matter what's going on. :)

Revolving Credit said...

I'm way too perky today. But it's only cos it's Friday. :)

I really hope you took my advice and disinfected that book before you used it last night!

Peas on Toast said...

Rev - whatever mate. Hahaha, I was alone last night. But I'm just so excited it's Friday, I could literally...wee.

Anonymous said...

Love is awesome you right Peas. The cliche "better to have love and lost than to never have loved at all" must surely prevail.

But in true cynic style I often wonder whether its all worth it when against all the odds you meet, against all the odds you fall in love, against all the odds you become lovers, soul mates and best friends to the exclusion of all others. And then, in one fucken moment its gone and all you left with is a gaping chest cavity and pieces, just fucken pieces. Is the process of picking up the pieces worth doing it again. Hmmm. I dunno hey. I just don't know.

Revolving Credit said...

I see you read the chapter on Golden Showers!!

Peas on Toast said...

Anon - yeah. And this is whn I get into a wobble and panic and freak out. Because I've been there too, over and over again. This whole Devil-may-care attitude I've adopted is a little reckless, admittedly. And I just hope I'm not going to need hours of therapy after this.
So yeah, it's a tough call - I totally agree. It takes a certain madness to deliver yourself to it over and over again.

Rev - I beg your pardon?

Revolving Credit said...

You're excused!

Peas on Toast said...

Dude.

Revolving Credit said...

I dig the way you guys make love sound like an accidental shotgun shot to the chest.

Sounds like you may need a gun license to fall in love.

Peas on Toast said...

Yeah it's a bit like that.

Rev what are you experiences with this possible-fatal emotion?

That guy you know said...

Love, I have a love hate relationshit with that emotion! I am spellbound by acting silly and having that goofy smile on my face while on the phone. But I hate it when you loving that one who likes you back!
Suck Big Time!

Peas on Toast said...

That guy- yeah it's immensely frustrating and lonelier than anything else. It suckkkks. Is this a friend of yours?

Peas on Toast said...

Damn, and to think I started the day with "I am not even MacBovvered!"
And now I'm bovvered. I'm suddenly not in a happy space.

Somebody help me!

Champagne Heathen said...

Love is like a shotgun shot? THAT'S what I am doing wrong (wrong?)...I hate guns & violence, and avoid them at all costs.

That Guy You Know & Peas... yeah, love that is not allowed to be realised can be the loneliest, most heart-cracking/shattering pain-aching thing. Excuse me now... I have some male love songs to go & listen to & sob... (Champs shows emotion when it comes to love. Fuck me.)

Champagne Heathen said...

Peas...one word... Lionel!
*shudder*
I can't believe I just promoted him!

Peas on Toast said...

I'm MacBovvered Central.

I'm thinking a little...Kurt Cobain will put me right! Thanks Champers, but I'm clearly on Lionel Overkill over here.
(sigh)

Revolving Credit said...

Kurt Cobain...good choice.

Didn't he stick a gun to his head and blow his brains out...now thats love!

Champagne Heathen said...

Not before dating Courtney Love for a good long while! Now THAT'S love!

Peas on Toast said...

Yeah he did so that hmmm.

OK, I'm switching to Air Supply.

Champagne Heathen said...

Right now I recommend...

You have the choice of REM "everybody hurts", Damian Rice's "Blower's Daughter" from CLOSER (Nice & Stalkerish), and all Counting Crows.

OR... The '80s to cheer you up. Less Michael Jackson. More Boy George. Hell, just LOOK at the Boy George covers & you'll be happy in seconds!

Revolving Credit said...

There we have it...love drives you to putting a bullet through your head!

Revolving Credit said...

Fugees - Killing me softly!

Peas on Toast said...

Yeah the 80s, 100%. The other stuff is a little Toaster In The Bath for this Friday.

At the moment I'm on 'I'm Only Human' by Human League and another little corker 'Gold' by Spandex Ballet.

Love that guy.

Revolving Credit said...

Bob Marley - I shot the sheriff

Champagne Heathen said...

Or it causes you to strangle yourself naked (INXS).

OD on anything (Jim, Jimmy, Brenda...)

Or become a hillybilly comando umbrella-weaponed baldy (Damn you Justin for telling Britters to Cry You A River! Damn You!).

"Bang Bang" By Nancy Sinatra

Revolving Credit said...

'One More Suicide' by Marcy Playground

Peas on Toast said...

Here...I am...the one that you love...asking for ano-thah day...

Fuck I love Air Supply. You just can't knock it. You just have to love it.

Reckless Youth said...

SpanDAU ballet, Peas, not SpanDEX.

And Rev - the Playground again? Holy crap man. Enough with the little kids!

Peas on Toast said...

Reckless - I'm well aware it's SpanDAU. But I prefer to call him Spandex. I mean, have you seen his wardrobe?

Champagne Heathen said...

"Jannie's got a gun" Aerosmith

"Try not to breathe" REM

My boss just told me I look uninspired... I don't see how. Thinking about song titles on suicide cos of love is highly inspiring!

Who are these spandex people?

Revolving Credit said...

Ahh...Necklessed Youth, I see you're done playing with your sex toys..umm...I mean 'action figures' and have graced us with your commentary.

If I was going to stick to what is apparently your preferred theme, I would have chosen:

Marcy Playground - 'Sex & Candy'

Revolving Credit said...

'Mortal Combat' by Utah Saints

ThomG said...

Great stuff, Peas. A little love in everyone's life is a nice cheese plate. With a little roast garlic to spice things up.

Peas on Toast said...

ThomG - bless, garlic and cheese - yummy! As long as both parties are eating it :)

Champagne Heathen said...

Peas... this song has just come onto my iTunes & seems exactly like all you were saying today, so go & take a listen to one of the wisest of love-shafted artists who says it in an uplifting way:

It's a Hard Life by QUEEN.

And hey...IT'S FRIDAY! And I am outta here to find me a convention centre full of wine! Bring it on! Have a gorgeous one!

not a fairy tale princess said...

Relationships are in no way easy. Maybe that's just my exprience of it.

Insane Insomniac said...

Ladies and Gents, with all this talk about love and relationships, I MUST INSIST that you listen to this particular album - Even If It Kills Me by Motion City Soundtrack. It has the best love songs i've heard in a while.

I'm a cynic in general when it comes to the whole love thing but listening to these songs make you nod your head and go - maybe i should give it a try, again.

Peas on Toast said...

fairytale princess - hey, I feel like you at least 50% of the time :(

Insane - thanks my dear - I will have to get my hands on that!