Tuesday, May 06, 2008

deep contemplations & my first day

Wow, so my first day was pretty darn cool. Exhausted come day-end, but that's probably because I had so much new information going through my head, and I have to adapt to an 8-6 again.

So much to learn, and I have a fantastic mentor. Be still my jangly nerves: I'm pretty stoked.

Wow all this change...it feels like I'm a completely different person to who I was two months ago. And I am. Hell. This whole period has left me with all sorts of questions, not even directed at anyone specifically, just questions.

One of my findings in this mumbo jumbo “trying to find enlightenment” crap, is that the human race is split 50/50. When it comes to good and evil. I used to believe that every single person in this world – fucked up or not – was good deep down. Peel away the layers and somewhere everyone has a heart. I dunno about this anymore. In fact, I do know – let's just take that Austrian fucker as the worst example.

A dude has children with his daughter who, at 18, he locks up in a cellar. Then proceeds to also have an “upstairs” family with his allegedly unassuming wife. I mean, how the fuck did something that fucking insane and inhumane live to get away with this for over twenty years?
His daughter is now in hospital with a mock bunker built about her, because she and her children (one who is dying of an in-bred related disease), are so disoriented with the light of day.

I just don't understand the evil side of human nature. Even to a smaller degree, those who don't appear to have any sort of conscience or heart.
Those who walk away from something seemingly and completely uncaring.

And what is it with Austria and Belgium? Two beautiful countries, steeped both in history, gorgeous landscape, and first world amenities, how come so many paedophiles and crazy fucks seem to spring from there? OK, I can't generalise, but I'm just trying to fucking understand. Maybe a small faction of these societies are having an identity crisis. Belgium isn't quite France, and Austria isn't quite Germany.

I don't know. I'm trying every angle to get to the bottom of human depravity at the moment. There has to be an explanation for such behaviour, come on? Maybe the world just needs balance in order to survive. There are good people and there are bad people. Before I thought, “what happened to these people? It must've been hectic. They were born good deep down!”

But they're not. Humanity is split 50/50. This is why people refer to Earth as both Hell and paradise at the same time. There are dark elements and there are light ones too. All due to the human race and its basic flaws, and our impact on the planet in general. Not everyone can be trusted, not everyone feels the same as you and I do (or you and I don't do.)

And it's an important lesson. In not trusting, and equally importantly, in letting go.
It's a balance you have to learn.

Anyway enough about that. Heavy stuff for a Tuesday morning. Shit. I was in one of those deep, contemplative moods.

Nuff about that. Back to work!


Anonymous said...

Deep down, we're all red and squishy. All bets are off on everything else.

Nessers said...

It brings up the old argument of nature vs nurture doesn't it. What happened in his life to turn him that way or was he like that by birth etc - just makes me grateful I had the parents I did

Peas on Toast said...

Kyk - deep down we all have intestines, yes. :)

Nessers - ah yes, the classic "nature vs nurture". Up there with politics and religion. Apparently this Austrian cretin had a relatively normal life, and a bright dude as well. Perhaps his synapses weren't firing properly, who knows. And yes, one has to be grateful for fantastic parents.

Ta^KiLLa said...

Very deep for a TUES hey..
Apparently the Austrian dude was devastated when he heard his neighbor had a young daughter.. Sick Prick..

Erm u diss lawyers.. fair enuf.. But i feel accountants are worse.. No offense to anyone..


Peas on Toast said...

Ta Killa - did I diss lawyers? Nah, I've never had a personal problem with them at all, not yet anyway! :)

And yes way too deep for a Tuesday! :)

Champagne Heathen said...

This whole Austrian incident has fascinated me. But for me, it also makes me wonder how many more cellars & dungeons there are around the world with similar goings-on. Might be right under your neighbours' house... or could it be... would you notice...etc etc...

VdB said...

falling for the old media attention trick again are we?

just because some cases get some excessive media attention, you all think austrians are fucked up (oh no, Hitler was autrian too!)

just look around you, there's plenty of fucked-upness in SA too, it just is taken for granted

Peas on Toast said...

Champers - for sure, and in this day and age, we don't really even know our neighbours!

vdb - I agree with you, and I didn't make any mention of how fucked SA is in this post, mainly because we'd be here all day. And as I reiterated, one can't generalise. Of course not all Austrians are fucked up. Neither are all Belgians. As for the media trick - well, that's neither here nor there.

KaB said...

And on the news today...apparently he shagged one of his grandchildren...it always gets worse! Well you know, Hitler came from Austria...maybe it's something in the air?!? Whatever it is, I too believe in the notion that there are the good, the bad & the ugly roaming this planet...it takes all kinds to make the world go round!

Pity that they have to be such sick mother fuckers!

Peas on Toast said...

Kab - oh God he was shagging his grandchild too. But of course. It's one of those stories you want to follow closely, like watching a trainwreck, but I'm almost too repulsed to want to, if you knowwhadimean.

KaB said...

I know, it's revolting!

Apparently he & the daughter were reunited yesterday or today & that it went well...I mean honestly...that poor woman must be demented or something...seriously though! Have you seen the pictures of the cellar...it's tiny & there were 8 locked doors leading to where she was!

That's some freaky shit right there! I ain't be going to that place...Austria I mean! Full of whacked folk!

A generalisation...I know!

Peas on Toast said...

Yeah I saw the pics of the cellar Kab, and we were just saying that even if he gets a life sentence his cell would be luxury in comparison. And Austria is a gorgeous place, and yeah we can't generalise. But that's why I wonder why these amazing place have these stories like these!

Champagne Heathen said...

Wasn't Mozart Austrian?

Even Bismarck. Maybe. Is Austria ex-Prussia?

Peas on Toast said...

Champers you just might be right about the ex Prussia thing, but I can't be sure. And yes Mozart is Austrian. Love that guy though. He's a peach!

Champagne Heathen said...

Maybe then it's less an 'identity crisis' than it is seperation anxiety thing in the Austrian soil!

And may this be a warning then perhaps...never listen to Mozart backwards!!

Vimbai said...

Oooh, so you are the new girl on the job, any office hotties?

As for that Austrian geezer, eish...all i know is that he must be more ying than yang, evil sod!

My question is, how can the mother claim she didn't know...such rubbish!

Peas on Toast said...

Champs - separation anxiety, ha! A whole new twist to the theory - we could delve into this! Mozart backwards, hilarious!

Vimbai - I know, like the mother never knew! I find it hard to believe that for 24 years she had no idea. It's insane, the whole thing.

amanzimtoti said...

The mind of the psychopath is something we often discuss in our household. I think something goes wrong at some stage of their development. They are completely unable to see anything from anyone elses perspective but their own, which is what stops normal people from harming others - we can imagine what it would feel like, a psychopath can't.

As for that Austrian fucker, I heard something the other day that really made me think: that guy's in his 70's right? So what was happening in Austria when he was a child?

It's not an excuse, because other Austrians and Germans his age are not fucked up, but one can't help wondering what he saw.

Peas on Toast said...

Toti - yip he's 73 if I remember correctly. And that's the thing - it could be developmental issues coupled with something traumatic, it has to be surely! Because this case is a special type of psycopathic altogether.

Tertia said...

that story completely threw me too. is absolutely revolting and just highlights how perverse human beings can be. absolutely sick. just mentioned it in a blog post scheduled for tomorrow. so gross. xxxx

amanzimtoti said...

It just occurred to me that that Austrian mo-fo must have been raping his daughter in front of the other children and his grandchild/child in front of the others as well. How fucked up must they all be now.

Peas on Toast said...

Tertia - isn't it just appalling? And as a mother yourself, I'm sure it hits home pretty hard.

Toti - yeah, it's fucking messed. I just wonder if they're going to get to the bottom of the whole scenario, given that his wife is either completely deaf or knew about it; and that the three kids downstairs aren't socialised enough to have a conversation past grunts.
It's so sad.