Friday, June 20, 2008

and so, here starts the lesson

Just another conversation with my father. (This is textbook stuff):

Dad: Peas. If there's one thing you need to remember: always remember names. Always.

Peas: Why hello Dad.

Dad: Now listen carefully.

Peas: Dad whose names did you mix up or forget?

Dad: No, no one's, but listen to your old Dad when he says it's imperative that you remember people's names...the disinclination to do so is...not a good thing.

Peas: Again, where's this lesson from? I need context.

Dad: Shit. Why, why didn't I remember the bloody NAME?

Peas: OK Dad remember when you drummed into my head that one time that I should 'never follow the sheep.' You know, always be myself?

Dad: ...yeah, ignore that one. This one is more important. Besides the old one got you into trouble at school. Which became my trouble.

Peas: Yeah, so, what about remembering people's names?

Dad: If I die Peas, if there's one thing you should always remember: remember their names. And quote Michael Caine who simply said, 'I was wrong. Next time I'll remember their names.'

Peas: He really said that.

Dad: Yes. Now. I need to go and rectify a situation.

This is when I enjoy him the most. Although this is an especially good example for my father's textbook. He is a very special dude. Special taken in both contexts of course.

So my colleagues and I are off to an orphanage this arvy. We're going to plant a veggie patch with them, kick a ball around and serve hot dogs. It might make me cry, but I think it's going to be an awesome afternoon.

I've put my footie-cum-gardening shoes on.


kyknoord said...

You do realise that this means he shouted out the wrong name while in the throes of passion?

Peas on Toast said...

Dude. Please let's not even go there. OK too late. Please try and erase that from my memory banks. Somehow. Anyhow.

leez said...

EEUUWWW!! No child wants to think about their parents in that way. No matter what Freud says.

I'm terrible with names so the best solution is just to use generic nicknames for all and sundry.

Unless she looks directly at you and asks "what did you call me?" pretend as if nothing has happened.

Peas on Toast said...

Leez - I quite agree. Anything along the lines of:


Is perfectly feasible.

Betenoir said...

My problem isn't so much forgetting namesas neglecting to learn them in the first place (when they are but aqueaintances), and then realising; months into a friendship; that i've never actually heard their name being used, and don't know what it is. this has happened to me more than once.

ontheverge said...

im kinda useless with remembering names. Iv tried recently to get better at it but being in Japan is a defferent story.

There are names from Tanaka to Masahiro to Nakamura. And those are the easy ones

Peas on Toast said...

Bete - oh god, that's exactly it. I moved into my new place and forgot my LANDLADY'S name. Week's have passed, but the 'asking for your name again' shpeel is also long gone - we've come too far. Even her bank details haven't helped - initial and surname. Fuccck.

ontheverge - hahaha, that's pretty funny. What's the Japanese term for 'dude', dude? ;)

leez said...

I'm with Betenoir on this one.

I still don't remember half of my collegues names and I've been here almost six months. I'm still on the "chick form admin" "dude from IT" phase.

The worse is when the personon the other end asks you which one? and you're required to give a description without being mean.

Peas on Toast said...

Leez - hahaha! Then you get those who take it very personally. And sure, within reason, if you keep forgetting someone's name, fair enough.

There was this girl that I knew through a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend. And I saw her maybe twice a year, if that. Couldn't for thew life of me remember the fucking name. And she reckons, 'Peas, it's MEGAN OK. MEGAN. How come you can't remember my name for fucksakes.'

It's just that I hadn't put in the effort to remember it in the first place. And frankly, if she'd forgotten mine, I really wouldn't have given a stuff.

Charmskool said...

Yoiks I think forgetting names is generic - you get it from your daughter - whatsername bete something? I just call everyone sweetie dahling and wave my chunky jewellery around to distract them.
P.S. Your dad sounds very special
P.p.s. Your arvie is going to be grand and I would def cry a bit.

Peas on Toast said...

Charm: and wave my chunky jewellery around to distract them

I love that! Hilarious :)

Sweetie dahling, I can't wait until this arvy - it's gonna be emotional though!

Lisa said...

how do you think almost everyone in my world lands up with unique and special nicknames that almost everyone around them ends up adopting?...

Peas on Toast said...

I'm not sure. But can I call you Poen too?


Lisa said...

sure thing, Beanie ;-)

Coffee Hore said...

The nickname thing works but it has gone a bit toooo far in our house. My sisters boyfriend caled her "hiëna poeppoltjie" the other day. I mean for fuck sakes, translated it means: Hiëna arse.

Peas on Toast said...

Cooffee Hore - cool name by the way - on names and all...I love the deeltekens you put over Hiena. It takes effort - I like it. :)

Hiena Arss is definitely original. I might even use it myself. ;)

leez said...

Those deeltekens are so Afrikaans!!!

Reminds me of an Afrikaans writing course I did. It does take effort.

I can't even be bothered to check the english I write.

Mini said...


I did a sppech in school many a year ago on how to remeber names and faces.Parts of it I do remeber was for a name like Denise,picture your niece or for Richard picture him being rich,or for an uncommon name like PetrocellI picture your pet rolling in jelly(lol).

Anyway I hope I was sought of a help.Mwah!

Cameron said...

Except that I'm sure your father does not call you peas but rather your name....speaking of which, is there any particular reason why your blog is anonymous?

I find this a bit at odds with the subject matter of your blog, which is all about you, and yet you are not showing YOU by keeping up this sham. It's not like you're saying anything so scandalous that warrants the secrecy/anonymity. At least nothing I can see, it all seems pretty innocuous.

Sorry, I'm not actually meaning to attack you, it seems a popular trend amongst SA bloggers (ex-South African myself), particularly the commenters on this site. My very brief research revealed you, Golden Beagle, Charmskool, Don't Believe a Word I Write, Leez, Chester Pillow. But I can't help but feel YOU started the trend.

Could you enlighten me on your reasoning? I'd appreciate it...

Peas on Toast said...

Leez - deeltekens rock the party, but take too much effort in this here blog :)

Mini - definite help babe! I've also heard that you should always repeat someone's name as you meet them, and it tends to stick if ou say it out loud.

Cameron - hi! Interesting question Cameron - I don't believe I could ever take credit for having a blog nickname trend - it's been like that for years: chat rooms, dating sites, blogging - people use names. This is the Internet, one has to proceed with caution. Also just because someone has a handle or nickname doesn't mean they're genuine - it just guards their privacy a little more. Many people who read this know me anyway. It was never meant to happen that way, but people do know who I am. So changing my blogname from Peas to my real name wouldn't make much difference at this point. It just comes with the territory. It's hardly a sham, it's just another name for myself.

Blogging is also an outlet. It serves so many purposes - venting, ranting, raving, opening up, community, etc. So having a name on screen is just something people have done for years.

That's my take on it anyway.

Peas on Toast said...

Sorry was mean to say 'it doesn't mean people aren't genuine because they have a screen name.'

leez said...

I think that being anonymous actually allows one to be more open rather than being a sham.

Perhaps someone should start reading the archives?