I've managed to avoid getting sick for 5 months. Now I can't breathe or swallow. FUCK THIS SUCKS.
Both sides of my family are pretty highly strung, but Dad’s side is completely hyperactive, all with soaring metabolic rates that could burn 45 hash browns in 30 seconds, type of thing. So I've been tearing around with them.
That aside, the goal of this weekend was to spend some time with my grandfather – he’s old and I have this feeling I probably won’t see him again. Although this is no time to think finality.
I also came down to attend my uncle’s 50th.
It’s intense; it’s family-centric, and hence why I am still here, on a Monday.
The 50th was fun. Peas hit the Klipdrift only because the first year Stellenbosch students manning the bar let me in on their little secret and retrieved a bottle from under the counter especially for moi; and I embarrassed my 16 year old cousin with my dance moves apparently. (‘Peas, [hands on hips] those moves are so embarrassing.’)
Oh then my uncle – the man of the moment – ‘Peas, you’re by far my naughtiest niece.’ (Uncle Gary, I’m your only niece. Have another drink big guy.)
My dad and Brit aunt said the speeches, and my poor uncle – the youngest of them – certainly got it as a kid. They used him in all sorts of garden and construction experiments it seems, with my dad, the eldest making all sorts of aero-dynamic equipment whereby my uncle would be the Test Pilot, all too gleefully.
Like the time Dad tied his feet and hands together and threw him in the pool. W.T.F. Or attaching the go-kart to the foofie slide with my aunt, while whacking Uncle Gary in the driver’s seat…only with dire ‘splatter against tree’ results.
As promised, I spent a bit of time chilling with my Grandad too. He really was so happy I came down to Cape Town, and that was the main reason I came down here.
Walked my dog on the beach, drove around my old student car for a fair bit (can’t believe the thing still rolls, seriously), and dealt with Dad, who has lost another 7 screws since I last saw him.
I think Dad needs to see a therapist. Seriously.
As I said: Intense is hard work. Especially when you’re constantly pulled in two directions by two families. It’s always difficult and I get very frustrated by both of my [estranged] parents because of it.
I fly back to Johannesburg tonight. After I quaff 3 litres of grapefruit juice, because it looks like I'll spend my last day in Cape Town in bed.