Wednesday, February 18, 2009

phil in his chinos


You know how Picasso went through his Cubist period, then he had a Blue period, then he painted dogs, or was it little girls? in everything?

Well, not similarly, or even close to anything like that, I missed pilates yesterday (pitched up an hour late.)
My bad. Fuck! I never miss stuff. I’m prompt! Germanic! On top of my game! Unfalteringly! Hydraulically! Annoyingly! …because I got the times wrong.

God, another week of muffin tops peaking over jeans. Oh well. Something to grab onto, I suppose.

So I instead drove to Rye-vonia, blaring the likes of Groovy Kind Of Love on my speakers, (oh yes – actually I am just like Picasso in every way – I’m going through my …Phil Collins period. And boy is it orgasmic.)

He’s a genius, and I had the hots for him in Std 4.
Had a poster next to my desk and ev’thing.

His music videos are quite something. It’s like standing with an electrical appliance in the rain and seeing what happens-type of music. It’s almost toaster in the bath, but there’s also a slight chance you won’t come to a gruesome end.

In Groovy Kind Of Love, he sits in this studio – wearing chinos - watching a very-90s looking slideshow of all the times – good and bad – he had with a bird, whilst chain smoking away on cigarettes looking like he’s about to burst into tears. He’s also wearing a wifebeater in one of the love scenes. Steamy. YouTube it, my oath.
In other words, Phil Period: Listen don’t necessarily watch.

He did power ballads like Maria Von Trapp did children.
Uh, that sounds bad.

He did power ballads like Thatcher did Downing Street.

Very well.

Had a drink with the Dove, and ordered a gin and tonic stronger than the Hoff’s fan base in Germany.

She says she’ll eat an entire eisben if I wear hightop converse takkies in Berlin.
That’s a tall fucking whoreder if you ask me. Eisbein – a boiled ball of pork – she gets away with that – and I have to wear – shudder - takkies in an outside urban and public environment?
What’s she on?

I said only if I get to say “Das ist ein uberhund, ja liebschen” to a random stranger in the street while I wear them.

I think that’s fair.


kyknoord said...

*snort* hh man, you really need to start writing music video reviews for a living.

Peas on Toast said...

Kyk - keen as. Any suggestions?

Bridget said...

i LOVE phil collins. groovy kind of love, can't hurry love, two hearts, i ask you with tears in my eyes - who else has cranked out ballad hits like these?

Peas on Toast said...

Bridget - wooohooo! I think we may just be the only people in the universe right now that actually think Phil For President right now.

You do think he should be president right?


po said...

PHIL!!!! When I'm feeling blue, all I have to do is sit and think of you.

That is all I have to say.

Nessers said...

I went to see him at Ellis Park when I was 7 months pregnant with my first baby - it was cold and it rained part of the evening but I did not care cos he was brilliant.

the branch manager said...

Uberpeas, I love you... Speak German to me! ;->

Peas on Toast said...

po - my whole world can shatterrr, I don't care.... :)

Nessers - oooh you lucky ding! And your baba too - I have no doubt he had extra emotional and physical growth potential after that :)

Branch - halt mein kleinen uberhund, ich liebe dich :)

icepick said...

Yo Peas. I been wondering.. Since your book came out, do you think anything has changed in your blog posts?

Seeing as your name is just a google search away, (not to mention the assortment of pictures as well)..

Soz.. was just wandering.. :)

icepick said...

Im not a stalker i swear.

Peas on Toast said...

icepick - for sure. There's an almost certainty now that people I may not want to know my personal thoughts could access them.

But this happened way before the book came out too.

Just the way the cookie crumbles - and goes back to the primary core purpose of my blog: it's my creative outlet. And if people don't like it, then that's just the way it is. I'll continue to write for my own sanity, not anyone elses.

In a nutshell ;)

tyrone said...

Well said.

Bridget said...

I recently bought his Greatest Hits album. It was really really cheap. But whenever I slip it on during a dinner party, one or two people get misty-eyed.
Phil for Pres, ooh yeah!

Peas on Toast said...

tyrone - thank you china :)

Bridget - ooh fantastic - yip I have his greatest hits, the But Seriously and Genesis baby - when he was a team player ;)

He's the best. Let's be his pom pom girls!