Thursday, November 05, 2009
bridget is my best spinster
I think someone stole my washing.
Of all the nerve.
Whatever though. That is secondary, thirdry, to other stuff. So I have lost a few shirts. And some fucker has either climbed up my balcony/it’s blown off onto the street/sublimed for general mass consumption.
I have a policy anyway. I buy so many clothes and shoes, that over the past 2 years, every time I buy 5 items, I give 5 items to charity. So maybe that’s my charity for the month.
More concerning though, and in my head a lot this week: is my Dad. Saying - for the first time ever – and this is my father, please understand. [Elusive, covertly-independent, jaded, eccentric], saying to me, over the electric telephone: ‘Isn’t it time you got a boyfriend Peas?’
Well Dad, actually, what the fuck. I never expected this - er ever– especially after all the crazy shit you do, to come out of your pie hole. Out of everyone – everyone conventional, which is 90% of the population anyway - I thought you were the last person. Can I escape to Mexico please? Soon as?
If they came readily in shops, I’d buy one. If they came as business propositions, I’d acquire it. And it would be successful.
But as you’re aware, that stuff has had few happy endings for Peas in the past. And it’s something I’ve let go – and frankly, what a fucking relief. I’m alright with it – albeit in isolated situations - few and far between in this place – yet I’m doing a lot of things many couples can’t do. As in put all their energy into their career and travel wherever I want without a second thought.
I can be selfish, and I am. I’ve worked hard for it.
Not many people relate to it. But that’s a cookie and sometimes it crumbles.
Most of the time, it's all good. The past few trips, and next trip, I’m with somebody that I adore. But looking beyond that - on a purely latitudinal basis - is just silly. I’m a realist now and it’s certainly not a bad thing.
Positively, dear eccentric father, I have experienced love recently, if that means anything. There are long and extracted periods whereby I am single but being comfortable and accepting of my very existence thereof would be nice. Without the societal implications that derive the very life goals of most people – of which I’m reminded of constantly – I am ok – more than, even.
I am single Dad. And this may be for a long time/maybe even forever. Sorry.
Accept it. I have. It’s just the way it is right now. It’s really ok.
Seriously. If anything, I have had some amazing experiences that I never would’ve had, had I stayed attached and white picket-fenced.
Let’s take what’s going on, with my career and all the travelling I’m doing. Not to mention meeting interesting and sexy people in the northern hemisphere.
Can we go back to you not having expectations, please. I don’t, so why should you?