Wednesday, December 02, 2009

funky christmas parties


I miss Brian already. What a well behaved donkey of a dog – took him for three walks on the golf course, and he very considerately did a pooh in the rough.

Even took him out to the Design Quarter for a boozy lunch.

Ordered him a stuffed lobster pillow off the Internet.

I’m getting this to dognapping my godchild.

Went to French last night and walked into an AIDS Day expose. They bought in a charity theatrical company to do a dramatization. Which I have to say, was very very good. Only because it shocked the le crap out of everyone.

There we were eating camembert on water biscuits and having an obligatory glass of wine, when the woman of the show marched up to us in the crowd and demanded ‘Do you know that alcohol is the root of this disease?’

(And then went to explain that so many AIDS summits are sponsored by booze and hot women like Angelina Jolie – which gets people all horny, so they all fuck afterwards.)

Poignant. Wear a condom people. Double glove if you have to.

It’s our company Christmas do today. And we’re going to a spa. Instead of a potentially liberal booze tab involving kamakazi’s and tequilas like last year – we’re putting the budget towards head massages, reflexology and facials. Free champagne included.

Massage my head and make me look like a monkey lady. Do your best.

And I get to walk around in a fluffy robe and slippers all day.

Bring it.

Quite funny – and a good effort: one of my mates woke up to find that someone had stuck penises all over her car. If its her mates – good job. If it’s her neighbours – you fly your freak flag, guy.

2 comments:

Ruby said...

lmao!

We had our do yesterday: bowling at mowbray bowls club. food was good. pity about the wind tho.

hmm pamper-party sounds gooood! hope you enjoy your hot stone massages...

Thedailyspew said...

Double Glove? If I heard a mate double gloved, I would expect the next sentence to be I dont understand why she got pissed and kicked me out/left my place. Would you not be offended if some dude reckoned, you look like a walking GASH case I am going for extra protection?

Double glove will get you no love