Thursday, December 16, 2010


I've only been sick once since being here.

And it was hard to shake. Two weeks of endless nose scraping, aches and pains, talking like Janice on Friends, is enough to turn anyone insane.

Perhaps it's the pollution in London, or rather, just that you're constantly walking in it. Fumes and other crazy shit that sits in your sinuses all day, means it takes ages to get better.

So since then, I have been almost obsessively fastidious about not getting sick. I wear my gloves everywhere I need to touch a public railing, I wash my hands double the amount I used to, I eat my 5 a day, plus freshly squeezed OJ. I smoke less.

In fact, my cigarette consumption has but halved since living here. I can't smoke anywhere inside, and it's so dogs balls freezing outside that it kind of takes the joy out of puffing away.

I have filled this void with sausages.

As one is ought to do.

Anyway, so I've been extra duperdee duperdee vigilant about germs. It's become a little personal project of mine. Operation: How Long I Can Not Get Sick For.

I obsess about it. And then I eat cookies.

I ache to swab down the escalator railing at Waterloo Station and see what kind of cummy, gonorrhearical, anthraxy kind of filth rests thereon, and thence lie smug in the knowledge that my hands don't have any of this shit on them.

By now, you should know where this is headed.

I woke up this morning and realised I was ever so slightly phlegmmy. My throat is sore, my lungs feel a little heavy, my nose is runny, my head aches.

Fuck. FUCK.

Ever seen an OCD person who is about to travel to the Land of Schnitzel get pissed off?
The Brit is also feeling sick.

Which means we might just be room servicing ourselves with gluwein and schnitzel, in bed, on Flu Caps.

And then get eaten by neo-Communists in Slovakia thereafter.

Fuck. My plan has been foiled.

Oh. Oh and another thing: I have a mole on my back that has changed shape, texture and colour.

I am terrified. What do I do now? How does one 'register' for a dermatologist here?


cassey said...

Have viral choice and corenza c 3 - 4 times a day and you should lessen the sickness. I hope it's just a sniffle and that you get your mole stuff sorted out soon.

Peas on Toast said...

Thanks cassey - I actually am going to leave my desk and go to the pharmacy right now. Can't get sick!!!

Mom on a Wire said...

1) Lemsip . . . as tablets during the day, in hot water with honey at night.

2) You will have to go to your GP who will then refer you to a dermatologist.

Hope you feel better soon!

Peas on Toast said...

Mom - can I call you Mom? ;)


I have therefore got Lemsip, vitamin C, Echinacea, and Beechams All In One.

I feel all shades of shoddy right now..:(

MamaMeeA said...

Eish! Sorry you're feeling like shit - hope it clears up soon!
Have you thought of the possibility that being overly careful of avoiding germs could have the opposite effect to that which you're aiming for?
Regular exposure to germs builds the body's immune system. It's how the human species has survived as long as it has.
Just a thought...

As for that mole, haul your arse off to your nearest GP immediately. He or she will be able to refer you to a specialist, which should remove the worry about how to go about sourcing the specialist care you (may or may not) need - and quickly, too.
Fingers crossed it's nothing serious!

Roxy said...

I agree with MaMaMeeA, you can't avoid germs as it's not healthy in the end. Plus it's enough for someone to sneez in your company and you'll get ill if they are spreading things.

As for your mole, go to the GP and fast. He will HAVE to refer you. Don't leave until he does!

Hope you feel better soon.

po said...

Hey Peas, I had a mole issue once, I went to the NHS GP and they referred me to a dermatologist, they guarantee you an appointment within two weeks for that kind of thing. Otherwise go straight to the source and see a private one.