Tuesday, June 07, 2011

dansk und deutscheland

Wow, now that I've turned this corner, I can actually look forward to going to Denmark.

Dude. I'm going to Denmark.

Well, actually I'm going to Germany first, then afterwards I'm going to Denmark.

Germany is work; Denmark is play. I'm just pretty excited about the Danish vibe, because I haven't been there before. And I'm all about clocking up countries in my bucket list before I die.

Maybe people don't even smoke in Denmark.

I fly into Hamburg on Tuesday to do some work with my German counterparts in their office. Where I've been promised I'll be taken out to drink giant tankards of frothing beer.

After partying and working in Hamburg, I'll recover in Copenhagen.

I booked my journey yesterday. It feels weird to be going on my own again. Before I started dating my Brit, I had no issues with traveling alone. I absolutely loved it. The fear of the unknown, meeting new people, it was these times I learnt the most about myself.

I shat myself when I travelled in South America on my ace.

I will miss my Brit - he has become my number one travelling buddy. Even before we fully started going out.

Anyway, it took me about 3 hours to book my train journey across the country. I figured after Hamburg, I'd spend the weekend travelling across Denmark on the ICE train.

I get boners over trains. Train journeys are masturbatory for me. If I was a dude, I would've been a constructional train engineer *.

Dude. I am obsessed with high speed European train transportation. TGV (France), Thalys (Belgium) and Eurostar all arouse the fuck out of me.

I've done those, but I've never done an ICE. Germans pronounce it 'Itser Er', and it's this weaving, high speed white tapeworm that flies across the country at like 360km/h.

I have a hard on. Just writing this.

I was in Cologne years ago and saw them all lined up at the station. I remember thinking, very clearly, Get me on one of those trains. Put me on an Itser Er. And then I became obsessed with Germany after that. And the ICE was the catalyst for the weird German fascination I had. I blame the Itser Er.

Anyway, now I get to take one. From Hamburg to Copenhagen. It's four hours each way. And it flies across the watery islandic expanse of Denmark.

I will listen to German techno the whole way there and the whole way back.

So I'm pretty excited for next week truth be told. I'm booking into an awesome B&B in central Copenhagen, and plan to visit design museums, eat pastries and drink Carlsberg.
And see the Little mermaid, which everyone says is overrated, but you can't go there and NOT see it, come on.

My American mate was telling me about this nordic viking 'sweater' he bought there once. Which was coated with seal oil. For real. You could throw a cup of water onto the thing and it would just ricochet right off.

Cool party trick. I want one.

** Or just wanked more.


Kerry said...

Oooooh! Tip for the ICE train... choose a seat that is near the speed display. Yes! There are speed displays that say exciting things like 281km/hr. True example! :D

Peas on Toast said...

Kerry - oh my GOD are you serious?

I think I just had an orgasm. On my seat. In this office.

Dude, I am so finding a speed gauge. That awesome German technology just made me even hornier.

Kerry said...

Glad I could help. ;)

Flarkit said...

FYI, dear Peas: The Deutsche "pronunciation", is just their spelling of I-C-E. They pronounce the letters "Ee", "Tseh", "Eh" for 'I', 'C', 'E'.

Und das ist das A-B-C! Or "Ah"-"Beh"-"Tseh" :)

Peas on Toast said...

I've always found German strangely sexy, Flarkit. And now I remember why!

Flarkit said...

Ach nein, warum dan! Das deutsche lingo ist doch immer sehr, sehr schrechlich!

Wehr gehen mitt das metro nach dieser grosse Dansken lager und lieberwurst feste, ja?

Du bist eine kleine nachtmuzik? Ich liebe Sudwest!!!

(*ahem* enschuldigen sie bitte)