Wednesday, September 05, 2012
Dude. So you know how I'm obsessed with trains? No? Well I'm obsessed with trains.
Especially high speed fast trains. The Freud masters out there will be nodding their heads knowingly, thinking 'Ah yes. Always knew she loved a bit of a penis. Obsessed with cock. "Trains." Good one.'
As much as cucumbers and pork swords are aesthetically pleasing to look at, I really am referring to trains in every sense of the word.
One of the big draw cards for going to Japan is their crazy as fuck train situation over there.
The shinkansen. Even the name suggests that this is a pointy, very fast moving thing. Doesn't it? A shinkansen is a bullet train. And it looks like this:
Well poke my ass crack and call me Derek.
Look at that thing. It goes over 300 km/h, so if you ever had plans to stand on a stretch of Japanese track, your death will be a swift one.
There are also about six different types of Shinkansens. We are taking one of the varieties from Tokyo, south to Kyoto. Had to buy our 'Rail passes" here in London, because you can get a cheaper rate if you buy them out of country and you can prove you're not, in fact, Japanese.
The cheaper rate, for a week's pass - and this includes trains and buses in Toyko and some shinkansens - is two hundred pounds.
When I told you Japan was the most expensive country in the world, I obviously wasn't taking the piss.
To give you an idea, it costs me £100 for a month's pass for Zone 1 and 2 in London. And London is widely considered to have one of the most expensive transport systems in the world.
So when I say I am dedicated to all things train, I generally mean that I am so dedicated that I drag my wallet along, kicking and screaming, as well as my very agreeable Brit.
He's been so fantastic. He has really pulled our plans together, done most of the research and has found us the cheapest deals he can find after extensive poring over the Internet and endless dedication to Project Japan. This holiday was my idea (as many of these places are, as it's my big thing), and yet he's grabbed the proverbial shinkansen by the shinkansen horns, swapping his novel on Pablo Escobar for the Lonely Planet.
We go in two days. I am starting to go a little bit insane with excitement.