Small Bum is currently waiting to hear whether he’ll get a job offer from one of two companies that seems awfully keen on him (and for good reason, I declare proudly), so has a lot of spare time on his hands.
He was insanely bored yesterday, so I jokingly asked him whether he could do my grocery shopping for me. To which he said: “Sure, write me a list, I’ll pick it up from your office.” Am I lucky or what?? Times are a-changing ladies. We work, they buy groceries.
I wrote him a list that went something like this:
1 x aubergine (big purple vegetable)
6 x yogurts (vanilla flavour)
1 x 2% low fat milk
1 x wholewheat bread
3 x slabs of chocolate
1 x heat magazine (which you’re allowed to read first in this case)
1 x whole chicken
1 x 100% orange juice
1 x bottle of sauvignon blanc, perhaps Durbanville Hills (not nasty, but cheap)
1 x fresh ravioli
1 x super absorbent heavy flow tampons (JUST KIDDING)
1 x You rock
1 x You’re the shizzle
1 x You’re great in the sack
He walked into my office, introduced himself to everybody and joked that he is a “sucker because he’s buying me groceries.” Bless his little heart. My colleague nearly fell off her chair because of his politeness coupled with the blueness of his eyes. * sigh*
I henceforth picked him up, took him home and made him a Thai prawn stir fry, while giving him the best place on the couch to watch Prison Break and Weeds.
Then I broke my sex-ban. We had a fantastic and much needed sex quickie, of which he and Third World Ant anticipate I will be disappointed with myself over. I’m not really, I’m just horny. (A special shout out to Ant thanking her for the condom.)
The big question is this: will he love and respect me if I do sleep with him more than if I don’t? I have no idea.
16 comments:
Somehow "I told you so" doesn't quite do it...
Of course it doesn't. You were all right, there I said it.
But hey, some credit to a nympho: I lasted 10 days!
Cookies for Elle - Why? Give me some sort of sales pitch and then maybe I will.
He buys groceries.. he's great in the sack.. he has piercing blue eyes.. and above all, he's stuck by you. You're lucky - it's not always so easy to find that.
Rays - I know. I don't want to fuck this up, trust me.
ag cute man...
You crumbled...
Damn, we should have had bets running on this one...would have made loads of cash here...
Oh - I can see that. However, in regards to your ex, just remember that despite all the uglies you two went through he is still going to hurt at the thought of you and Small Bums. When relationships end there is always that unfortunate 'upmanship' where each person has to prove how much happier they are than the other - a silly game that involves far too much energy than what's worth. A game that can also get ridiculous - especially when you're drinking that bottle of tequila and prancing past eachother thinking "He/She SO still wants me!" - hey it's natural and we all do it!
Sounds like you're moving on both speedily and healthily, more so than he is.
Marc - thank god you guys didn't bet cash. I'd be homeless. And between you, Billy and Martin, you guys could probably buy a new car together.
Rays - That's why I was so sad that my ex found my blog. Whatever happened between us, I still don't believe he deserves to have it spelled out to him how great Small Bum is. As for games involving who is doing better, etc, I don't do those.
And even if he does know how great I am doing, I don't intend on reiterating that to him. Because I wouldn't want him to do that to me.
As for moving on, I do believe I am, and I am lucky. I still have my down days, but Small Bum was the best accident that ever happened to me after such a long relationship.
I just cracked up last night after you left my room - that big, pleading "Dude, can I , um, BORROW a condom?" sent me into giggles! One request though - please don't return it, it's all yours :)
And, it's not cool that SB turns up without a condom, he really should be more prepared! (I'll give him a break for last night, you 2 were on a sex-break, after all).
Oh, and you lasted longer than I thought you would, so kudos for that...
Ant - I cannot thank you enough. Of course, I should've just not had sex on the basis that myself or SB had no protection, but at this stage it was almost impossible not to.
I'm still deliberating whether I should give the celibacy thing another shot. Wait - I've got it! I won't say anything to him, I'll just pretend I don't really want sex at all. Yes, yes! Then he won't think I'm deliberately holding back, he'll just think I don't crave him as much, meaning he will probably want it more himself. Right?
Good plan? Or immature and ridiculous plan with no real followthrough?
Here's an idea... don't set yourself any timeline to abstain, just see whether you can wait for him to make the first suggestion of having sex. In my case, I'd be waiting a very long time, but in yours, I think SB might actually make the first move after a week or so... Can you hold out that long?! (I sure as hell know I can't)
Cunning plan! I won't mention sex in any form and see if he starts missing it. When he decided he wants to jump me, then I'll happily oblige.
I like it. I like it alot.
Sorry peas - missed why you are even thinking about whether you should or shouldn't have sex with SB? In my experience, if you seem disinterested in sex in a relationship, then the guy is completely put off ...not so guys? I think this may be a game which backfires on you.
Nonsense! To put someone off, you would have to show a complete disinterest in sex at all...and if you're a smart woman, then you know exactly how to keep someone curious without actually doing the deed!
And of course you caved, Peas. What self respecting woman when offered her grocery list in perfect order wouldn't? And by someone with piercing blue eyes????
You are indeed a lucky, lucky girl!
HAHA! Some things arent even worth betting on......
Thanks chaps - don't worry, I'm no frigoid bitch. I ensure that I keep him occupied with other stuff ALOT of the time :)
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