Well something cheered me up immensely last night.
On the way home from drinks at a friends place, I say to Small Bum in the car:
"If you had the opportunity to do anything to me...think about it...anything, anything! Or you had the power to get me to do anything to you, what would it be?"
This was an innocent stab at trying to talk dirty with the guy. Innocent because I don't have the ability to do it like a porn star, and innocent because, in fact, my dirty talk is mostly clean.
To which I get:
"I'd want to stick it up your left nostril."
Luckily, I found this so amusing I thought my sides would split.
He was joking, of course. But I'm thinking dirty talk can't be learnt. It's not a technique that is gained. You're either good at it or you're not.