The Ant is back, my flatmate returns! Although Third Roommate has been around on the odd evening to quaff wine with me and talk shit, I really have missed my little Ant. Chad, although not much of a conversationalist himself - he is a rodent afterall - has been on the recieving end of my diabolical verbal diarrhoea when I return home from the office.
I'm not only relieved that The Ant's back for company reasons. You see, we both have a serious domestic job at hand: I deal with The Landlady From Hell and she deals with Pretty our maid. That's how it works. As lovely as she is, I am having a very embarrassing issue with Pretty.
I hide my dildo on purpose. It's under my dressing table for a reason. Oh no, Pretty has since the last three weeks, had other ideas. She whips it out and puts it on my desk in clear view of everyone. And there's no mistaking what Bushie 3 000's job at hand is. She's doing this on purpose, why else would she place Bushie in such a vulnerable place?
On cleaning up, I have a lot of compilation CDs. They’re all over the place. On the carpet, in my car, in the CD player, everywhere.
The thing is, they are all labelled. And in light of my recent reading-through-my-last-break-up-posts, they have a timeline of all their own. These are their actual labels with no embellishments:
Mozambique 05/06 Holiday Choons
February Loved Up Shag Choons
Break-Up Toaster In The Bath Music (Ne Yo’s ‘So Sick Of Love Songs’ starts this beeyoot)
Karaoke Fuck Men Who Needs ‘Em Choons
Single And Coping Music
My Own Love Affair With Peas Choons
Alone And Loving It Hits
Pre-Mandog (Manhattan Club) Let’s Go Out! Songs
Living Carelessly: Choons For The Poen (From C – with ‘All By Myself’ as the final song…Bridget Jones style)
And the latest: Peas’ New Lease On Life (Choons from Ex S, bless him)
I could base a diary just on my music alone. Each CD is based on a phase, not always nice. But the latest kicks ass. Especially listening to when I’m in the bath drinking a satisfyingly chilly glass of La Motte, or my latest squeeze has his arms wrapped around me.