Wednesday, May 02, 2007

overused lines

Well, after a long weekend filled with Foxy Forearms, I broke it up before something serious was to begin.

I freaked out. Ran for the hills.
I pulled the whole “it's not you, it's me” line.
Smooth, Peas, for Pete's sake – why didn't I just read it to him straight out of the textbook?

It was almost like that time I broke it off with someone by saying, “I think we should start dating other people.”
I bought these men a one way ticket to ItsNotGonnaHappenVille, using a complimentary cliché voucher.

After a night spent at mine, I turned over and told him I probably wasn't going to see him again.
Hot bod, hot pecs, smoking hot forearms.
Impeccable manners.
A gentleman to end all gentlemen.
A genuine biscuit.
But I cannot be in a “thing” right now.
I'd only hurt him more down the line.

I still miss Dick sometimes. Don't know why.

43 comments:

I are wearing the jean pant said...

Something gives me the feeling that you will definitely be seeing more of him in the future, even tho you gave him the line...

other-duke said...

Suppose it's better than: "it's not me... it's YOU"

Peas on Toast said...

Jean pant - I are fascinated by your opinion why?

O-D - common freudian slip up that one :)

I are wearing the jean pant said...

An "overused line" has an "over-experienced" reason:)

Peas on Toast said...

Jean pant - ...it's tough when your life becomes a cliche.

But then, one doesn't want to be all, "It's not working, get out of here and my bed now."

I are wearing the jean pant said...

No insult intended towards you though! I are just speaking out of my own jean pant experience :)

Peas on Toast said...

Jean pant - None taken :) I'm trying to think of one person who hasn't said it before.

If they didn't say it, they've definitely thought it.

The Pete said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
kabintsimbi said...

mmm, I have to agree with Jean Pant...really do hope you get to see those sexy foreamrms again!

Would be interesting!

Peas on Toast said...

pete - fiction rocks doesn't it?

Kab - he'd do better without me babe. Trust me.

The Pete said...

Fiction is indeed rad.

kyknoord said...

What, you mean you wasted a perfectly good "things are really complicated for me right now..." moment? Ah well, next time.

Anonymous said...

Why did Pete get administrated? Did he say fuck?

Peas on Toast said...

Kyk - next time :)

The Pete said...

The Pete got administrated because the lines of fiction and reality got blurred.

Martin said...

Peas, you should take it as a compliment that your style is so distinctive that it's impossible to miss. I'd be chuffed.

The above being said though, you should know by now that you just can't hide away on this interweb thing. Embrace it!

That, and you did at a stage mention the pizza place... ;-)

Peas on Toast said...

Thanks Martin :)

The Pete said...

The Pete would like to apologise for causing any kind of upset (if there was any).

Peas on Toast said...

No worries The Pete. :)

Louisa said...

At least you're not faking it Peas...

Billy said...

Peas: this you too?

Style seems very similar and the contents got you all over it.


http://lifestyle.iafrica.com/stilettos/

Champagne Heathen said...

Just chill for now. Concentrate on your career activities for awhile, abuse the bushwacker, and let men bumble on their own for awhile. All will be great on that front all in good time.

Nothing you don't know. But this is like a cellphone note. Just popping up to remind you.

Peas on Toast said...

louisa - contrary to some beliefs out there, I never fake it.

Billy - must be my long lost soul mate! :)

champers - thanks man.

Billy said...

take that as a yes then.


Germans!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Da Mario said...

Good for you! By the way, I got that line used on me over the weekend as well... hehehe.... i thought it was pretty funny and did nothing about it. I was probably done a favour.

Ich spreche Deutsches said...

Billy... I think you're probably spot on... its the Lionel Richie comment that sold me.

Peas on Toast said...

I have no idea what all of you are talking about.

Surely I can't be the only person in the world that likes Lionel. OK, sure, fine, it's rare...but truth can be stranger than fiction.
:)

I are wearing the jean pant said...

I are loving the Lionel Richie! He are wearing the very retro jean pant.

Billy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Peas on Toast said...

I thought he wore the tight leavver pant?

;)

Billy said...

So right on the truth and fiction part.


*Dumbass slinks into the corner and beats his detective skills down.

Peas on Toast said...

Billy - don't beat yourself up hot one! Lionel isn't SUCH a bad singer! :)

big T said...

in the immortal words of jean pant.... aaaaggggggggg kakka

N. Cognito said...

Nah, that's not her on iafrica. I know the chick that writes that column.

Peas on Toast said...

big t - as they say in china. Bress! :)

N.Cog - I should meet this chick. I mean, if she digs Lionel as much as I do, perhaps we can even, be, like mates.

N. Cognito said...

I can hook you two up - you on Facebook? Nothing under "Peas on Toast"

I are wearing the jean pant said...

He-he...

Revolving Credit said...

So still no sex hey?? :(

May be worthwhile getting rechargables for the whacker - seems like you're in for a dry spell.

The Pete said...

The Pete recommends Rufus Wainwright's cover of Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah

Peas on Toast said...

Rev - howz about an 'olliday up to JHB, big fella? :)

The Pete - well now, I couldn't possibly say no.
:)

Anton said...

Okay this is just my two cents worth (hopefully American cents, 'cause of the current exchange rate) but you broke it off for a good reason.

Based on (admittedly) limited information, it sounds like he's a babe-ish guy, and there's nothing physically or mentally wrong with him.

So it is you, and not him...I'm guessing.

Since you appear to be (admitted based on little intel) reasonably normal, there are only a few possible reasons you broke up with him.

One is some childhood trauma, like one parent cheating on the other when you were 12.

The other, not so uncommon one, is you aren't comfortable getting involved in a commitment to a relationship yet. Not unfair: a real commitment means a sacrifice of at least a part of yourself; most relationships involve compromise but it's normally more for one than for the other partner.

Then there are games, psychological warfare, etc. I'm guessing you've been in at least a few serious relationships.

If so, you know what can happen when you compromise your identity in them. It is unfortunate that we humans are so hard-wired for social relationships that we give up so much of ourselves in certain circumstances. But then again, it's part of our nature. Interesting.

But I digress.

You obviously need time alone. And not just with the girlfriends, or whatever. Set up camp on the periphery of your social network, hang out there, and don't get too involved in the doings of the "soap opera" for awhile.

Read, get into comics, pick up a hobby. Whatever. write your Novel on the Human Condition. Just get into a space where you can clear your mind.

Or something.

Peas on Toast said...

Wow Anton - thank you!
You've hit the nail on the head - everything you say here is absolutely true, and it's exactly what I need: time out.

From the parentals to my past relationships - they've all been factors.

Anton said...

The parents divorcing at the age of 12 is actually autobiographical.

But like the Highlander sensing another immortal (sorry - geek reference) I'm getting a sense of others who came from broken homes. I had it easy though - many have gone through worse, and after my parents got over their shit they became friends - to this day.

But enough about me. I like this blog of yours, and will probably be posting regularly posting here. So it's only fair to warn you, I'm a misanthropic kind of guy.

Not the bitter condemning of all things human kind, but the generally, uh, Hobbes-type (he was a tiger in a comic book, although someone said in a previous life he was also an Englishman - puh, whatever! Hobbes ate Englishmen for breakfast - along with, strangely enough, Earl Grey tea...)