Monday, July 09, 2007

horsey boozy gatherings in july

Well a nice Durban July. A little different from last year, but just as off the wall.

1)The plane journey down was pretty amusing. Our two male travelling companions – Bladder and Chunky, C and I got a little boozed before we took off.

The loud people on the plane.

Bladder's beer found it's way out of it's cup and onto laps, causing Stubs to scream and make a scene on landing. We also made an announcement on the bus to the terminal: “Road trip everyone! But hold on, WHERE ARE BLADDER AND CHUNKY?”)

2)We gave three dudes a lift home from the local pub on Friday night. How? They sat on our bonnet. Correct. Bonnet.

3)Jolled with the ex, Small Bum (Remember him?) who I can now call a mate, which is cool. So much fun. He is in another relationship now, bless for him. But nothing more annoying than when you're having a serious conversation and a chick is butting in and trying to get involved in said conversation.

4)I took a pee on the pavement in the headlights of the taxi driver who dropped us off at home. Bunghole and vajayjay in headlights. Charming.

5)Ended up, after going to bed, half asleep and with same clothes on - trying to leave the house to find a bar. I believed my mates were being boring Bertha's not wanting to go out – but I was stopped at the front door and reminded that pubs are closed at 4:00am.

6)Thanks S for having us in Durbs. She was a brilliant hostess.

7)Got tanked early at the July. Peaked at about 3:30pm. But discovered that taking 8 Essentiales means that I had zero hangover the next morning. Nothing. I'm telling you, as an experienced alcoholic, Essentiales are the way forward. This means I can satisfy my favourite hobby (smashing drinks) without the downfalls. Pop them. My liver feels like a million bucks, and it really shouldn't. Trust me.

8)Bladder painted my nails. Bless. Men can learn.

9)I need to be more of an aggressive tactic charfer. I'm not actually good at spadework. When someone else claims someone, I will back down and believe the score potential isn't fair game anymore. See, I'm actually nice. I need to learn to be a bitch and not care.

10) Was grumpy yesterday, for various reasons, but generally a fantastic weekend. The July did close early this year – 9:00ish or so, which was a bit pants. And Tiger Tiger has closed down. How shit is that? Made some new friends and met some interesting folk. Just wish I could've stayed in Durban longer. At least it's warm down there.

11) When in Natal, I find myself slipping back into the accent pretty easily.
In Pick 'n Pay:
Peas: Hi, sorry where are the chups?
Lady: There by the fush.
Peas: Oh, next to the fush fungers?
Lady: Yes.
Peas: Kuff. Thanks.

12) Big T (all out in his cravat and double-breasted Panama suit), lost a member of his party – who – wait for it – ended up in Maritzburg the morning after the July. They first went back to the racecourse to check he hadn't passed out in his own vomit in a porter loo. But no, he was in Maritzburg. With no clue why, how or when he got there. WTF?



Peaches said...

And the messiness? Proper. Sounds awesome, glad you had fun and hope you had a drink or two or three for me.

kyknoord said...

Yeah! I love those airport bus road trips. The last time the driver was older than god, so bus trip took longer than the flight.

Peas on Toast said...

Peaches - proper messy. Definitely had a few (too many) drinks for you babe!

Kyk - yeah - and dontcha hate it when the dude suddenly stops and because you didn't get a seat or a handle to grab onto, you fly around the bus?

Betenoir said...

hmmmm. Sounds fun. I washed my pillows thisweekend. So about the same level of excitement, then.

seriously, I don't know where you get the energy.

Peas on Toast said...

Bete - washing pillows! Now I'm jealous. :)

Energy? 'Sleep when you dead' is actually my middle name...

capdog said...

So what do you think of our little Westville local?! Not bad hey!

Pretty crazy that you ended up at the same picnic spot as us, small world, seriously!

Peas on Toast said...

Capdog - Twas lovely to meet you! The local was fantastic - we had a few laughs there, definitely!

Revolving Credit said... you let some randon guys ride your bonnet!

Peas on Toast said...

Revsicle - well, that would've been nice. But the rental got the ride, not me babe. ;)

Chester Pillow said...

Did your horsie win?

Peas on Toast said...

Well Ches, it's hard to say m'dear. I'm still not completely certain...

Chester Pillow said... bet on the donkey hey!

Peas on Toast said...

Ches - yeah, I always go for the under dog. :)

Chester Pillow said...

Under Donkey! Well, glad it was fun! Sorry too hear about your bonnet!

Peas on Toast said...

Thanks dood - no the rental car remains unscathed. Was a fun weekend though, I just wish I wasn't in freezing cold Joburg again! :(

Chester Pillow said...

Cold Front Buggaluggs! Can't get rid of her. ;')

Peas on Toast said...

Ches - oh hectic bru - is Buggs back on the scene?

Revolving Credit said...

Did you guys have to use the bail money? And the tetanus shot?? or didn't he score??

Peas on Toast said...

Revvie - all I know is he was the one who landed up in Maritzburg the next day. So it's fairly possible he found a lovely lady of the minger's night there...and hence, the take will no doubt unfold.

Revolving Credit said...

Is a tequila shot cheaper than a tetanus shot??
Just give his a shooter and send him on his way.
Although, that may have been the cause of the Maritzburg jaunt in the first place.