The Dove and I were amusing ourselves to the point of hysterical distraction last week. We'd like to start our own Facebook groups, and we know that the following – although sick and deluded - would be very, very popular.
Two members-popular maybe. Hmmm. Two very enthusiastic members who fancy themselves a bit of a card:
Our Potential Facebook Groups:
When I Can't Access Facebook, My Scrotum Explodes And My Balls Fall Off
When I Scratch My Ass, I Have An Orgasm
My Ass Is Smaller Than George Bush's Intellect
Sometimes I Just Wanna Pick My Nose In Front Of People To See What Happens
When Facebook Shuts For Maintenance I Sweat Excessively
I Am Willing To Change My Surname To 'Scrotum-Licker' To Keep Facebook Alive
Satan Loves The Missionary Position - Ask Me, We Did It
I Act Mental In Public So I Get The Best Seat On The Bus
My Mother Fucked The Postman....And Now We Get Milk Half-Price
My Nipple Is Bigger Than Your Nipple Group
I Have Taurettes Fuck You Shit Fuck Asswiper Shithead Syndrome Society
Who Ate All the Pies, Mama Cass?
I Boofed Danny K In the Manhattan's Bathrooms
I Spank My Boyfriend With A Wet T-Shirt Cos It Turns Him On
I Ate My Foot Cos Jesus Told Me To
I've Had Sex With All My Facebook Friends
I Want To Spit Roast At Least Five Of My Facebook Friends
Say 'Yay!' If You Like It From Behind
I've Chundered On Someone's Shoes Before...Possibly Twice
Eat My Shorts Meredith Grey
I've Had Sex On A Xerox Machine
Facebook Stole My Social Life And Now Mark Zuckerberg Is My Top (and only) Friend
Barbra Streisand Was My Bitch Back in 1963 – No Seriously, She Was My Bitch In 1963
What Happens In Vegas Stays In Vegas – Or Does It? Share Your Secrets Here!
I Had Mumps When I Was Five. I Also Enjoyed Eating Ants. Only Sometimes, However.
PS: Peas On Toast was mentioned on CNBC Africa last night. My comrade told me so. I was (sort of) on the telly. Well, no, I wasn't on TV, but my blog got a mention. Blessaroo.