Friday, September 28, 2007
the stuff in there
This fine piece of aquatic underwear was found in the broom cupboard last night.
Having lived with someone new for over a month now, I've certainly learnt one thing, and that's the power of organisation. Through the medium of my new flatmate, Martha Stewart. She is incredibly house astute, and very, very brave.
She attacked the broom closet last night. The place where Ant and I would stuff random things into, close the doors and hope when we next need a towel/hammer/sun screen/dress up bikinis, that the whole thing wouldn't fall down, crush and asphyxiate us.
We were probably the messiest, most disorganised two friends – the Ant and I – to live together. Martha Stewart has breezed in and taken control, and I am both amazed and flabbergasted by her bravery. Although, come to think of it, no one I have ever lived with besides Martha has been particularly orderly.
It's one thing organising the kitchen cupboards (hmmm, what have we here? Tomato sauce circa 1945), or the garden outside (we've replanted the whole place, with manual labour and even watered it. Yeah, watered it).
But she did the Don't Go In There cupboard. And she told me excitedly what she found.
(She also mentioned that we make a dress-up clothes shelf. I'm liking this girl more and more. She loves dressing up, and we'd dedicate an entire shelf to one of my favourite past times? Fuck, she's great!)
But she found the following amongst other unmentionables:
Half a tool set
Empty bottles of sun block
This bikini (which I wore in Mozambique, fyi. The locals loved me)
10 Accounting & Macro Economic textbooks (ummmm....oh dear. Ex S didn't collect those.)
3 university files full of business science notes (fuck, can he leave everything here?)
A revolting mat from his varsity days
A hammer and three nails
An old cellphone
A fibre optic lamp
A blow up mattress
A blow up sheep (Australia Day 2002. In the US. Strapped lewdly to my digsmate)
Bicycle crap like tubes and energy sachets
A box of photos
The Zimbabwean flag
It's amazing what skeletons you can find in your own closet.