Getting excited, learning the coach's name, what the H-posts are for, and stuff. Kidding, but you know what I mean. E2 had her birthday party on the day and turned it into a lavish rugga fest. I was most impressed, because like me, she's one of the least sport-interested friends I have. A rugby World Cup cake, two TVs in and outside her house...and not to mention an extravagant dress up opportunity.
I wore a green top and the gold lamé tablecloth that drapes over a table in the lounge. Gold lamé fabric has never been more versatile. It's been a gold toga, a tablecloth and like on Saturday, a pencil skirt, a mini skirt, an 80s meringue and a nappy.
And to win!
People were all...Bok jerseys and vuvuzelas. The nation just had the fever. I have lost my voice from screaming in jubilation.
Sunday though, there was a break in my happiness.
Martha Stewart and I chatted about the word 'admin' yesterday. We both agree that the word is derogatory.
I am admin. Or so I have been told before. And it's all very blasé, and “oh she's just one of those creative fly-off-the-handle- types.” Yeah, pure administration in other words. My friends laugh about it. I don't.
What I fail to understand is that I, prior to a week ago, had a different view. I thought of myself as an assertive, take-no-shit individual who doesn't have a problem standing up for herself. Perhaps a healthy, if not skewed, view of reality. But, silly old me, this apparently just comes down to one word: and it starts with an 'a.'
But what many people conveniently forget is that Admin, or high maintenance = high returns.
High maintenance people are honest and open, they know what they want and deserve; they put themselves out there. They're also compassionate; they get it that people can be emotional and demanding in return. Why is it when someone asks for something, it's considered "oh she's admin?"
Now that it's sunk in that I'm one of these people after our discussion yesterday, I feel low. Very low. Which is just more admin, isn't it? Well never fear, I'll just fucking disappear so that everyone around me can live happy lives without me and my fucking admin.
(I can't literally disappear, obviously. I mean, I'd need a special Invisible Man potion. Which I can't get even on the black market, or so I'm told.)
(Other admin people - please feel welcome to come forward and tell me how they deal with being 'admin.' That may help. And why is 'admin' so wrong anyhow?)
Funnily enough, admin attracts admin. Most of the people I associate myself with are
Usually I'd just say, “well fuck it, that's who I am.” I can't help it. Perhaps it's my genetic pool haunting me (my family can be...uphill), or “well, hopefully I have other endearing qualities that may counteract me being 'admin.'
But, today, I don' have the energy. I'll do what I usually do when I feel really shit about something I can't change. Slink into a hole for a few days. I don't even know when I am being unreasonably admin. I always thought I was reasonable. How shit is that?
PS: I was just 'admin' wasn't I?
PPS: Sorry, can I have a complex now?
PPPS: 'Admin' people always come last.