Wednesday, August 20, 2008

fish & clips

1)I found so much of my 90s Techno Fabulous stuff on YouTube yesterday. This is all very lovely and everything, and it's done it's best, but I can only listen to these songs online innit? And I can't write videos into MP3s can I.

As a result, I have 5 browsers open on my computer and am madly shuffling between each song so it's a sort of Million Pages Of YouTube Open playlist. Distracting.

2)I'm going on a fishing trip this weekend. No, not 'that type of fishing weekend' weekend, a trip where the fine icthological trout flow freely in the gurgling streams, amongst a backdrop of gently rising Lydenberg foothills that reach into the crisp sky. Like rural Scotland. Maybe.

Hello, Dinner.
Yes please.

A whole lot of us are going on a fishing expedition with Big T. The last expedition included a dude rugby tackling a fridge and tripping all the electricity, and whopping quantities of red wine in front of a fire.

I fished using a net, standing deadly still in gumboots in the freezing river – poised and ready to strike. Like a wild cat in its natural habitat. A hungry feline, carnally honing in on its meal.
I don't have the patience to deal with twine getting caught in bushes and just standing there with a pole, uninvolved and hoping that something might swim past and bite. Don't fancy not being allowed to talk while I do it either.

I stood there, frostbitten, imagining catching a large and forgiving fish, using pure reflex and dexterity.
I imagined boring down on one, then presenting it to the dinner table as a large gift, that just happens to taste fucking incredible with lemon juice and garlic.

And there would be much celebration. And we'd charge our glasses to the most amazing freshwater fish caught by a woman; using only a net. In freezing water.

Yeah. Never quite materialised.

Odd that.

I will persist again this trip. And also drink a lot of red wine and play the fool.
Marvellous.
Big T said he's put me in charge of music. What a sweet guy, the others, though, might not agree enthusiastically with his decision. How perfectly fucken marvellous.

3)I have signed up for Allen Carr's smoking rehab.

My name is Peas and I am a smoker. [Hiiii Peas.]

Have booked my seat and taken a day off for the big moment. It's a whole day session. And they pretty much guarantee success.

If not, [Discovery] gets its money back, after two free back-up sessions.

This pretty much has to be it. Anyone who smokes knows how fucking hard it is to give up permanently, and how it gets harder to give up every time you try. I'm terrified to stop; gaining weight, being a super psycho bitch from hell for a week....but the chapter has to be over.

Everything in my life is right at the moment. In that I am happy, stable, content, all the good stuff. The one thing I need to fix is my quitting smoking.
That's pretty much the only personal thing that bothers me these days, the smoking.

So, yeah 19 September. I wish I could do it sooner and just get it over and done with, but that's the only session straight after Greece.

It's apparently a completely different approach to other smoking rehabs like Smokenders, but I've only heard good things about the Allen Carr method.

I will give it my best and most amazingly resilient shot. (The quiz on Smokenders revealed that I 'have a high level of readiness' to stop. Doesn't everybody though?)

30 comments:

Smiley Face said...

I've quit smoking about 10 times but always seem to be right back with a cig in one hand and wine in the other. It is indeed a problem.

Enjoy fishing!!

Peas on Toast said...

Smiley face - ooh and look at your avatar! Very posh indeed! :)

Smiley it's so tough to quit on your own - I've tried everything - the nicotine inhaler, not drinking etc etc - doesn't work for the longterm. I've booked myself into smoking rehab as a last result. :)

harold said...

let me change your life.

keepvid.com -> it allows you to paste a youtube video address into the provided text thingy and then lets you download the prreesssioussss vids... et voila !

i quit smoking cold turkey. it only took copious amounts of wine gums/chewing gum and all it cost was an added 2kg's of body fat and numerous clumps of hair. good luck anyway !

Michelle said...

Um... Peas? Check this out: http://www.dvdvideosoft.com/guides/dvd/convert-YouTube-to-MP3.htm

Peas on Toast said...

harold - oh my god, you BEAUTY! And Michelle too, thanks so much chaps!

This is going to change my life. Oh my god oh my god oh my god.

Thanks chaps, going to start doing this RIGHT now!

And Harold, well done on quitting cold turkey by yourself. I quit for a year once. A YEAR. This time it will be forever.

Shadow said...

"being a super psycho bitch from hell... "
So? No change in personality then.

No Really. Stop smoking isn't that hard. It's a 3 day hump. BUT, as soon as you drink… OMG! It's the only thing you can think about.
You basically have to give up both.
And giving up more than one thing at a time ... that's a bitch! So don't make me do it...

kyknoord said...

Have you tried the Cutting Your Head Off method? Absolutely guaranteed to work. Killer side-effects, though.

Peas on Toast said...

Shadow - yeah no change in personality, except for the part where I actually kill people. :)

The three day hump is imperative. Done the three day hump numerous times. And it is FUCKING hard, drinking or no drinking.

Kyk - I'll be cutting other people's heads off, that much is fairly certain.

Peas on Toast said...

PS: HAROLD! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH RIGHT NOW. MY LIFE HAS CHANGED!

Miss T said...

I had a friend who quit smoking cold turkey and it became very scary. At a traffic light one day a guy came up and started washing my screen. She lept from the car and threaten all sorts bodily harm if he did not return to the dumpster that he came from. I had to pull her back into the car. He was scared. I was scared. People in the other cars were scared. I nearly drove her to the nearest spar to buy her a pack of cigs

Ches said...

OMG...you've stopped smoking? "battle down the hatches"

Make sure you keep all sunglasses away from Big T's Big foot...mine fell victim after he was trying to lift me into the ceiling at the wanderes club!

Peas on Toast said...

Miss T - ah fuck, just reading that makes me itchy. It's something within the realms of my possibility when I give up. Shouting at windscreen washer men, bearing my teeth and barking at them...

Ches - not yet, 19 September. And if Big T stands on my fake aviators with gorgeous gold detail, I'll kill him. I will.

Lou said...

Hey dude

FYI on the whole Alan Carr thing. The two free back up sessions are "conveniently" during work hours. As a result I wasn't able to go to them and when I started smoking again (1 week before I came back from India - stoopid)I sadly didn't get my money back.

It is a very good course though but make sure you go to the follow ups.

Later

Peas on Toast said...

Hey Lou, thanks so much for the word.
Yip, the shit thing is that these courses fall during working hours, and I'm hoping one session will be enough. If not, I really don't know how I'm going to nail this quitting thing, quite honestly.

Lisa said...

whoooaaaaa mama!
i did the allan carr thing!
lasted 5 months
5 hellish grueling months
did the 2 follow-ups
didn't last
couldn't
as you well know
good luck babe
HPF

Peas on Toast said...

Oh no Lisa, I thought you went on Smokenders?? Oh no oh no, this isn't good. I'm terrified this won't be able to help me, where does one TURN??

The Divine Miss M said...

Girl in my office did the Alan Carr thing and said it was utter bollocks.

I quit by just going cold turkey. HAVE THE WILL POWER PEAS!!!

Ps - Next time pretend that you are a bear waiting to pounce on the fish in their natural habitat. Screw the fishing rod, use your hands!!!

Mini said...

I gave up smoking ,but the thing is cigarettes didn't want to give me up!(I guess we married)

JL said...

boy: Teacher, teacher, they're all talking about smoking!

Teacher: Dumn shits. It's all about the fish, Tommy. Don't get addicted to nicotine - trout fishing's the real high just don't pee in the water because you might get the penis fish.

boy: what's a penis?

Teacher: A penis Tommy is what the devil uses to unlock the gates of hell, which is why God invented latex which is like a locksmith. Thank goodness the latex locksmith sometimes brakesdown while the devil is on his way to open the gates, otherwise I wouldn't have a job. Haha. Go play.

Boy: OMG! I need to pee, teacher what do I do.

Teacher: I guess you'll have to keep it in until you explode and then the gates will never open.

Boy: what happens when the gates open.

Teacher: all hell brakes loose.

Have fun. Don't pee in the water.

JL said...

Ah crap... I spelt breaks wrong. Too much writing about cars.

Anonymous said...

Peas- I read the Allen Carr book (well the bits I thought were important) and stopped for almost two years...it's very good until you start to feel like you're in control and decide to have a drag while out drinking...2 years later and I'm a full blown smoker all over again:(
I started reading the book again-from cover to cover and am on the last few pages (whereafter you have to quite), been there for about a year:)

Anonymous said...

Peas- I read the Allen Carr book (well the bits I thought were important) and stopped for almost two years...it's very good until you start to feel like you're in control and decide to have a drag while out drinking...2 years later and I'm a full blown smoker all over again:(
I started reading the book again-from cover to cover and am on the last few pages (whereafter you have to quite), been there for about a year:)

Anonymous said...

Peas- I read the Allen Carr book (well the bits I thought were important) and stopped for almost two years...it's very good until you start to feel like you're in control and decide to have a drag while out drinking...2 years later and I'm a full blown smoker all over again:(
I started reading the book again-from cover to cover and am on the last few pages (whereafter you have to quite), been there for about a year:)

Anonymous said...

and by quite I mean quit:)

Anonymous said...

and by quite I mean quit:)

sleeper said...

Yo, yo POT.

Allan Carr is the shizzness- quit for 2 years now and I am still able to give the holier-than-thou eyeball to the fallen.
There is a trick though- never, ever, ever have so much as a drag of a cigarette once you've done the course- you'll go back to where you started, and inevitably, suffer the associated losers.
Good luck out there, shum.

The Blonde Blogshell said...

Holy shit! I just bought the Allen Carr book *complete with 2 CDS*
I did NOT KNOW there is a session you can attend! Dude! That is bloody marvelous! Where, how, when... no ways!!
I AM SO BLOODY EXCITING! THIS IS A PIECE OF SMOKIN' NEWS...Sorry!

OH and I fish too...I fish the I&J box straight out the freezer!
:-)

Peas on Toast said...

Hi chaps, sorry back to back meetings!

Thanks so much guys for your advice on Allen Carr and smoking - and shit it's going to be SO hard this time. Bloghsell - come and attend the sesh with me on 19 Septemeber - just give 'em a call on their site. I read the book babe, didn't work very well :(

Smiley Face said...

Goodness Gracious! I honestly didn't know there was a smokers rehab!

Inneresting, very very inneresting. I feel bad at how many cigs I had at work today now.

Leila Starfish Pan said...

ummm...word of caution about the allen carr thing.

they guy we had spoke in very smooth, quiet tones, and repeated a lot of words in the same very calming soothing way. i got suspicious...and then thought nothing of it..and then i saw blankets...and asked what they were for...and he said we have a sort of sleeping session at the end.

I walked out. it sounded too much like some sort of hypnotherapy i did give not consent to ...i may be wrong of course.

good luck1!!!