Monday, September 01, 2008

glad wrapped toilet & sea sundry

So, hello pikey.

Chavtastic:

I spent a little bit of time in the full on sun today and am an awesome shade of orangey pink.
A lobster that got out of the sun JUST in time, and hopefully when I awake, I will be golden brown like the rest of the Europeans here.

Water-side gin and tonics. Lost track of time, just chilling on the beach sipping on cocktails with the rest of the population. Not my [direct] fault.

Rhodes is not authentically Greek. It really reminds me of the Thai islands, to be honest. A little like Ko Tao. Where some of the architecture just looks out of place, if not a little tatty. But in all fairness, have only seen this side of the island. Will explore the rest tomorrow.

God I’m being chowed by mosquitoes right now, hell’s noombies.

But I like the tattyness. Charm. We realised after some exploration that we’ve been put on the windy leeside (?) part of the island, and the beach and water are beautifully warm, but there are other better covey beaches to see, that’s for certain.

Walking into the sea takes co-ords. Co-ords I do not own, ok. Especially when the wind is waaing, and I’m carrying an inflated pink lilo that just about gives me enough wingspan to take the fuck off.

Plus the pebbles. Ouch muthafucka. You need to get off your feet as soon as possible, which means floating on a wave that is 2 centimetres off the ground in order to have in-tact feet. It hurts. It’s pretty – but the pebbles don’t make for swan-like disposition on entering the ocean.

Still. We swam, tanned, lolled about drinking mojitos and even managed to do random spurts of work in between. Then for dinner, found this unbelievable old castle, plonked in the Old Town, just somma. Must really look up what the fuck it is in my trusty old guidebook.

We’re hiring wheels tomorrow to go and explore this huge island. ‘Wheels’, because me and American Colleague are scared of mopeds (after my accident on Ko Phang Nan – it’s cool, I will stick to a car, am terrified after breaking my knee open), and the boys will do bikes.

Ate another huge platter tonight. Aubergines, tzatziki, the whole vibe.

Seen a lot of hair. I’m just saying.

PS: Oh and another thing: You gotta love the Swiss, holy haloumi.
This is a toilet. Yes, for real.

When you press the red button though, the glad wrap on the seat shuffles away. It rotates, but ends eventually. Trust me, I checked. Chilled in the can for like 20 minutes pushing the red button to see. Had so much fun in that water closet, Christ. It rotates only for the purest, most efficient of hygiene purposes. In a restaurant in Rodos Old Town.

Fuck, what a pleasure; and a hoot. Coulda spent hours in the bog pressing that red button. Clever Swiss. God you guys have it all going on.

PPS: Yes yes. So I spelt 'convenient' wrong in the paint tooled-picture. But I'm on a 50% holiday. Blow me.

22 comments:

po said...

Wow, what a cool surprise, was prowling the net at not such normal hours and see an installation of P.O.T.

Glad wrapped toilet? How weird, I mean, I have been to Switzerland and I never saw such things there. Do you think it is a case of, we trust our own clean toilets because we scrub them daily, but not those dirty foreign ones? Actually I went to some insanely scummy toilets in Switzerland, I wish those were glad wrapped!

Anonymous said...

LOVE your approach to the sanitary toilets - they've got them in some airports here in the States... in the back of my head, i always wondered if they just recycled the old "saran wrap" after a couple cycles... brilliant to run it down to the end to find out for sure! you are a travel goddess! rock on!

Revolving Credit said...

Toilet condoms??? What next??

I had a good chuckle tough, because I mis-read the one comment (what else can you expect).

I read:' ...inflated pink dildo..'

I was like WTF, you went to the beach, hobbled across the pebbles and dived into the water using a sex toy as a floatation device.

Obviously I'm up far to early.

My bad...hahaha

Peas on Toast said...

po - how's that toilet eh? Had such a giggle! Yeah I reckon the Swiss export them to the countries that might so be sanitarily-able. ;)

daisy - ' travel goddess!' I love that! I really really love that!

Rev - HAHAHAHAHAHA. No, I left the Bushwhacker at home, Rev. Remember, we discussed this. :)

hahahaha

Revolving Credit said...

Well, if you're going to swim in the sea, I reckon that the Dolphin would feel right at home...although, there's the need to prove that it's not a dangerous object when going through customs.

Peas on Toast said...

No ways. Mine's a terrestrial dolphin that sits in a drawer back in South Africa.

However. I see German people.

Yum.

Unknown said...

If I may ask, what work are you doing over there? (And how can I get to do it?) No seriously, just curious, have been trying to figure it out by reading older posts, but haven't managed to.

Peas on Toast said...

Kitty - we're here for an international conference comprising all the offices that fall into our region. (Europe mainly).
I started working here about 5 months ago, and yes, I love it! :)

Miss T said...

Soooo insanely jealous :(

Unknown said...

That's great, so lucky you love your job! I'm still looking for a job that I can say that about!

Peas on Toast said...

Miss T ;)

Kitty - I've become one of those people that live and die for their jobs. It's not difficult though, let's face it. I am so very lucky.

Lisa said...

at the risk of repeating what everyone else has said er...repeatedly :-P
i am so fricken jealous gimme that swiss toilet cos i need to barf!
btw, peas babe, lots of news on this side...things round the olde office, they are a'changin...
can't say more now, but will when we get to chit chat
which will be when yu are golden brown and i am pale
and we see each other at rose boys
missin ya honey
HPF
xxx

(L)indie Lover said...

STAY AWAY FROM DIE DEUTSCHERS!
Trust me... One of your funnier posts, I must say. I used some of your stuff on air on Sunday [radioshow] [anonymously] hope you don't mind!

Having drawn inspiration from you, I started my own blog. It's still a baby blog, but it will grow. Check it out if you have the inclination:

http://indieandajoke.blogspot.com/

Charmskool said...

Here's some really good advice you'll thank me for later. When drinking gin & tonic in the sun wear a biiig hat to shade your face. Drinking tonic water in the sun gives you brown marks on your face. Not sure whether it's the gin maybe? erm.. anyway just wear the hat - it looks glamerous and hides the drunken glaze in one's eyes so well.

The Divine Miss M said...

You're insane.

But then again I'd probably do the same thing.

Small things entertain me ;)

Anonymous said...

Fucking hating you right now. Just spent an hour in traffic watching red lights.

Billy - cant log in talk to your people!!

Peas on Toast said...

Lisa - oooh, ooh I hope it's good news and not bad babe? Email me, am online doing some work! I hope all is ok??

Lindie - very honouring, thank you - where did you 'put' my post on air though? I don't mind you using my stuff, but with due credits please. :)

Charm -oy vey! I wish I'd read this yesterday - as suddenly I seem to have grown a few nose freckles!

Miss M - I can't wait to find another one! ;)

Billy - ah am sorry man! That's a world I don't feel like coming back to right now, yowza.

kyknoord said...

It's still cold in Cape Town.

Peas on Toast said...

Kyk my dad sent me pictures!
I couldn't believe it, looked like a foamy chaotic pit, by the looks of things!

(L)indie Lover said...

Well I read out some of your "he's just not that into you" stuff on a little community radio station. Y'know, like a public service announcement. But don't know if I want to tell you which one, in case someone finds out who I am ;0)

Billy said...

77test

The Python said...

Your query...

we’ve been put on the windy leeside (?) part of the island

Leeside - protected side, so you are on the windward side.

No fee.