the chocolatier who had to

Last night, I finally got a cabinet delivered to me that I ordered months ago from Doc. A beautiful piece of Indian somethingorother, with doors and everything.

Makes a difference from the industrial looking steel shelf it was sitting on.
Anyway after months of waiting, it arrived and it's looking beautiful. Furniture that would even stand the test of time, and has some element of taste to it.
Pity though the TV makes it look fuck off ugly.

See, my TV is twelve years old. It's one of those original vintage LGs that is gargantuan.
It's about 600 times thicker than the thickest flatscreen out there.

Originally bought this puppy in second year varsity, and besides the solid green stripe on the screen down the right hand side - which is only distracting when I have a hangover - for R200, it was a steal.

That cutting edge design of the mid-90s that didn't quite stand the test of time.

It's also sitting on top of my video machine that I refuse to get rid of, only because all my Twin Peaks movies are still on VCR.

So for someone who works in the tech industry, my lounge looks like my grandmother's, and not the gadget garage it should be.

No bovver, though. I got other fish to fry: overseas travel. (Oh and a mistakenly purchased piano.)

Was, however, idly watching Girls Of The Playboy Mansion on it last night. And yes, this reality show has scraped the lowest depths of depravity in light of modern day capitalist trash, but last night was especially worthy of mention.

Holly, Hef's main squeeza, reckons for his 82nd birthday, she's going to get a chocolate moulded out of her vagina.

While the other girls ordered more contemporary and perhaps more palatable moulds of their body parts, such as their noombies and buttcheeks, Holly had a dude brush silicone moulding paste over her frou frou, and then proceed to turn it into a large piece of poen-shaped chocolate, which she then presented to Hef over dinner with guests.

(One including Pamela Anderson, but that's neither here not there.)

So that was interesting. “I know. I'll give him a chocolate crotch for his birthday.”

Especially when she waltzed into the chocolatier and said, “Hi there how are you super thanks for asking. Could you make a mould from my vagina? It's Hef's favourite part of my body.”

Well it worked. Apparently his other two birds are no longer. They've moved out.

Not that I'd suggest you do this for your boyfriends or anything.

PS: A bit like the Christmas Wish List, you want to do something cool this Chrimbo? How about giving away the stuff you don't want, or even collect your own gifts for those who can't afford it? Visit Ronald's Christmas-Jozi Style page for more details.