Friday, March 20, 2009

'kir' is a hoit de toit term for champagne cocktail

Aching man-testicles, do I have a crazy weekend ahead of me.

Too many kir royales with Klo last night, and too much wine at a birthday party.

I have a headache that feels like the continents are splitting again.

I wonder if the people I dream about dream about me. Why do my dreams feel so real and so hectic?

I have a wedding stuff this whole weekend, and perhaps, a coma on Sunday that I need to prepare for.

Jeepers, definitely had one too many of those kir guys with the formidable Klo last night and fuck does it hurt this morning. How did it happen? I wasn't meant to phuza. One minute we're talking; the next we're drunk. It all just happened so quickly.

Klo and I had a conversation I never thought I’d ever have, ever, in my life, ever.

She decided, we decided, over a few kirs – those bloody kirs – that I was going to get a cat.

ME. A Cat. Never

I can’t get a dog – and that’s what I want. And I’m not sure about a cat because a cat is not like a dog, has long hair, smells bad, has smelly piss, is all cold and hectic and not like a dog, is very Mrs McClusky on Wisteria Lane, and the feline is petulant and offish. But. It’s more feasible than a dog.

Are you insane? Have you been smoking crack off the rear-end of Mitterand?

I’m a dog bird through and through. Have books about how cool dogs are, everywhere.
Dog Is God Backwards, being one. And for ages I’ve been pining for a Staffie /Dobermann/ Boxer. How cool, and I’d call it Dennis and we’d go for walks everyday!

1) I travel a lot
2) I don’t have a garden, and live in a small flat
3) So therefore can’t.
4) And that’s just the reality of the situation.

Come. On. Dogs are cool. And sweet and lovely – cats are…hairy and independent.

If I ever got a cat, it would have to be like a dog. It would have to be a dog in a cat’s body.

And that is surely not possible. I’ve been told a Burmese. They’re friend-lier. I’d need a manual. Where does one even start. The Whiskas aisle?

My arms hurt. Fuck those champagne cocktails.

But seriously. Seriously? I do not like cats. But maybe if it’s MY cat, then maybe I would. Like people that hate other children who love only their own.

And they all have their own personalities. My last Staffie, Ombre, lives with my Dad. He swims everyday and follows my Dad around everywhere. Dad gives him a better life than I would – he really really is better off.

Car rides around town, beach, book shop, you name it, he follows my Dad like his namesake (‘Shadow’ in French). I miss him – he certainly has oodles of personality. Mirrors my father in every way.

Stop. That’s for one day, I just can’t now – for the dog’s sake.

Besides I travel every couple of months, so what, if I got a dog, I put it in the kennels? Every few months? That’s heartbreaking.

End of the day, I unfortunately just don’t have the lifestyle for a pet. Location, living, travelling-wise.

I will think about whether I really really want a pet after my Euro trip, Not before. If I’m worried about the responsibility/looking after/lifestyle thereof, of a pet now, there’s no chance I’ll be getting a pet post-trip. Not after getting absorbed into that world.

For now, my head hurts and have mere hours to pull myself together for a wedding this afternoon.


The Chantal said...

Speaking of dreams....I had one about you the other night, for realz, it's reading your blog everyday man, it must feel like i know you or something :P don't get freaked out now :)

Nessers said...

We have a cat at the office that is like a dog and it is the only reason I like her - she beggs for food (very un-cat-like) and she forces your hand to stroke her (puts her nose under your hand and kind of throws of onto her self). I hate cats but I love this one - I call her CAT even tho her real name is Ash (she lives in the flats behind my offices) and she responds to CAT. You should not get a pet even a cat when you travel as much as you do - sad but true

Peas on Toast said...

Chantal - serious?? was I talking and stuff? Whart did I sound like? Was I wearing red shoes? ;)

Nessers - yeah yeah I know :( Although three of my friends have offered to be godmothers/next of kins should I need to go away or die suddenly. However this is not an impulsuive decision I'm going to make. Thinking it through verrrry carefully.

As for the dog-like cat, bless man! So it is true - cans CAN be dogs. Excellent news!

dorothy said...

i've been having the same conversation. however. cats still people around and not being at home enough kills me with guilt.


i'm getting a dwarf hamster. they need to be alone so much that they kill other hamsters that are in the same cage as them. seriously. heard of one that bit out it's cagemate's eye.

and they're cute and die really soon so you don't have that whole attachment/death/broken heart thing to worry about

Peas on Toast said...

dorothy - I agree. I don't like leaving pets at home when I work. :(

On dwarf hamsters - I've had shitloads. Dwarf hamsters are Russian, so I had Sergey and Vladimir - problem was Vlad was a girl. And they bred something epic. Was at varsity, so I sold them to the pet shop for some sheckles.

They bite though hey. Aggressive little guys. Normal hamsters are quite chilled. And guinea pigs...they're the BEST.

frozen-heart said...

eugh dorothy! you think a dwarf hamster that can gaff its fellow cage-mates eye out is cute? .. oh hang on i get it you think it is cute if left alone in its cage... i gettit!
me personally, would think to feed it to the cat ;) now that's cute!
oh i know! i have my dexter morgan head on today ...
oh and peas :) neat blog love, think it through very very carefully this pet thing... i have two jack russels, a boetie and sissi both 8 months old - christ sake! what was going on in my head when i said yes to getting them is beyond all logical thought ... i hate the little fuckers now!
yep i deffo have my dexter head on!
have a brill weekend tho peas, best way to ease the ache, the head and heavy arm syndrome? drown it out!
oh ja, last thought> can we get picture/s of the wedding clobber? ag please! ugly girls like me live in dreams ;)

Peas on Toast said...

frozen - I very much doubt you're ugly, first and foremost! Beauty is in the eye of the beholder :)
You have a wonderful weekend too - and depending on the pics that come out, I'll give it some thought :)

My step dad LOVES jack russels, used to have a whole family of them. But your advice is sound, so am definitely going to postpone any pet thoughts until I come back :) xx

The Chantal said...

lol you did talk, I hope I got your voice right :P We were in a kitchen of someone's house drinking shots, then I got tipsy and you were like ooo Chantal's so cool/funny LOL, something like that. It's kinda embarrassing writing it out, and yes I think you did have on the red shoes.

ok your stalker will go now, have a good weekend :P

Peas on Toast said...

Chantal - hahaha, love that we were drinking shots. Very lifelike indeed :)
Have a wonderful weekend babe xx

livingladolcevita said...

Oooh, a little glass of champers. Yes please!

Peas on Toast said...

Dolce - don't we just? Us formidable females just can't get enough of the sweet. sweet nectar ;)

Nessers said...

Hamsters are not pets they are snake food *wg* a pet must be able to give affection

the branch manager said...

Peas, if you get a cat, get a black Oriental. They're exactly like dogs, except easier to keep. Friendly as shit, I had an ex who had one and it used to chase after people in the street get them to pick him up. Really! And I'm not really a cat type either.

Miss T said...

I have a Siamese and he is very Dog-like. Not independant at all and very needy.

One thing though is he never shuts up so could have great drunken conversations with it?

Fragrant Liar said...

Cats and dogs, totally different, like men and women, respectively. Totally untrainable. Can't go a day without you personally feeding and heavy-petting them. Have you thought about fish?

Peas on Toast said...

Nessers - SNAKE FOOD! I keel you, I keel you now! ;)

branch manager - shit, I should've read this before I adopted a ginga pussy!

Miss T - drunken conversations is EXACTLY what I'm going for here - sounds like my kinda animal! :)

Fragrant - I hate fish before, I &J. J kept on dying and they didn't dig it when I tried to cuddle them :(

Peas on Toast said...

Sorry I meant 'I had fish before'
Not hate. We hate haters :)