So hold the phone. Look what I got couriered to me the other day. Whilst at my desk, hating the world.
A spanking, bright new Give Peas A Chance t-shirt.
Isn’t it a meneer?
Even from this angle which was meant to slightly accentuate my tits a bit more [fail]:
Now I buy a ton of promo crap, as you might’ve established. Stupid crap like Jaesors and a shirt emblazoned with ‘Tiger Wheel & Tyre’ or a Flora margarine nail brush. Or like that one time, a fucken cap with ‘Absolute Vodka’s Blogger Of The Year’ on it.
Only to bash my head repeatedly against a wall and ask of the Universe, ‘WHY? Why do I do this to myself?’
This guy, I love. And it came with a FREE badge, no strings attached. It also obviously is slightly applicable to my life, what with the vibe being about peas.
And peace. If you hate peas, or even if you hate me (couldn’t imagine why, I’m so fucking lovable), you can always buy one of these bad boys for world peace. Made for girls and wankers – kidding for girls AND guys – that’s YOU, yes you dog, who gets a R50 discount - because you read this blog.
I’m not Isobel Jones, this is for serious.
Just by adding ‘PeasOnToast’ in the coupon section. Fifty. Ronts. Off. An. Already. Reasonably.Priced. Kiff. Shirt.
And you’ll be supporting South African design, a true blue pukka awesome South African website, and fuck, frankly, you’ll look as dashing as me.
Not convinced? Fine – check out this bad boy with all the right props:
With a loaded gun* [Jokes parents]:
At your next bacherlorette party [intentionally hazy because you’ll be fucked on tequila either way:]
With a bicycle pump: [Why not?]
At Mardi Gras, baby:
When you get arrested by a man who poses as a policeman with a toight set of man-buns:
Thank you to the dudes at Springleap.com. You guys seriously rock the foam party.