Friday, November 13, 2009


Drove through to my folks place in Pretoria last night. Don’t know Pretoria that well, only the exact roads, no detour, to get to their pozzie.

Slept over at my old duck’s.

Figured might as well. Need to go visa shopping tomorrow, and have no fresh milk in the house.
Needed a home made meal that wasn’t a take-out and needed someone to make me a cup of tea and tuck me into bed.

All that shit above hasn’t happened in months, years.

My house looks like a bomb has hit it, and instead of making love to the Hoover, thought better of it and hightailed it to my mother’s instead.

Where the sheets are crispy, the tea is Rooibossy, and she made me cous cous for dinner.
Rice so nice they had to name it twice.

Mum’s a health freak. She’s a neat freak. She’s a control freak. And yet last night, I was in that exhausted, ‘can’t be bothered’ state of mind that was suitable for such a visit.
Where I was too tired to fight it, and let her make me tea and point out my flaws. Full submission.


Then we debated my passport problem. That old chestnut. I have a new passport problem every week, so same same.

Realised I might be in a bit of bind.

I have two passports. They’re both South African and both haven’t expired.

One has a British visa inside it, still valid. Except there are no more pages left for stamps and visas.

Hence the new one. So I have to travel with both. But knowing my luck – (I’ve been kicked out of Canada before) – some bureaucratic bastard with a thirst for power at the UK passport control will fuck me over.
Just because he feels like it.

He’ll probably think something’s amiss, even though, to my knowledge, nothing’s expired and all is legal.

So tomorrow I’ll be standing in queues and having thromboses at two embassies. Mexico and the British High Commission.

Hence, being tucked into bed last night with a cup of Earl Grey my mum.

I’m anticipating a trying day.

It already took three explanations – using various tactics – trying to explain to Home Affairs my state of affairs.

‘No, again, the other one isn’t a British passport, it just has a UK visa in it.’

‘Is it expired?’ (Should we go over this the third time?)

For fuck sakes.


Anonymous said...

See if you can get them to put a visa sticker in the 'new' passport that says "visa in old passport". I had the exact same problem, only I had Zimbabwe passports-so IMAGINE how much fun THAT was at Beit Bridge, in Dec, in 35C plus weather.

Peter said...

You can have your old/full passport cancelled.
Legally, even if your passport is cancelled, the visa will remain valid as it is date stamped.

My wife had this problem when her passport filled up and we never had an issue at any border posts (flying in and out of the UK at average once a month).

It is a common occurrence and the immigration people at Heathrow are quite accustomed to seeing it.

Joe said...

my mate ol' woz sent me here for a good read. YO - you are funny :) must read your book.

hansmeevis said...

Anne, my wife, has the same problem. We went to USA last month and immigration is quite used to it.
Don't worry, the Brits have seen this one before, promise.