ding ding la la

It took us twelve hours to get home yesterday.

Twelve.

After seven modes of transport, six train stations later, two taxis, we arrived home.

Fuck me.

And all I can think of and dream of, is this:


That, my friends, is the announcement jingle at every French station across the country.

It sounds across the entire station at least every 2 minutes. I was in hysterics; the Brit was going mental.

In any other country, the general announcement jingle is a 'Bing bong bing bong...Attention, please don't leave your luggage unattended on the platform.'

Or even the less creative, 'Bee bong...Platform 5 for the Southern service to..[pause]..Chertsey.

Not en France. Just another reason why France is still my favourite country in the world. 'Ding ding La La! A-tarn-cee-yon....'

We'd had a bottle of wine in the two hour stop in Chambery, and I was finding this completely hysterical.

That said, our little sojourn to France was sensational.

Last year, my skiing was much to be desired. This year, after only one temper tantrum down a red slope (my mates insisted on doing this slope, first thing, first day. I lost my rag), it was the most awesome two days of skiing ever.

I was happier than Kanye West after showering in 8000 bottles of Cristal.

As my skiing improves year-on-year, my French only gets more and more le crap. It's depressing. I used to be fluent! And now I just sound like any other tourist who can't speak more than a few sentences. AArrgh.

Anyway, to see my mates in both Paris and Meribel was so bloody great. We had an amazing time.

In Paris, one of my best mates, Poen, told me she'd just got engaged. I was so excited I couldn't stop jumping around, shaking. As a result, because we were all there, we got completely pissed.

Pissed in Paree.

Possible the least cultural time I've ever had there, but what the hay, my mate's engaged. Frankly, it had to be done.

On a hangover only Satan could understand, we headed to the snowy Alps on the TGV. (And what a fine piece of engineering that train is. Damn). And therein, spent the time chilling and skiing and drinking and eating and smoking and chilling and skiing and drinking and playing and shagging and drinking and skiing and chilling and smoking and talking and eating and skiing.

Ding ding, la la.