Thursday, January 26, 2012

hair, tea & red trousers [again]


Henri, the toff who snaps people wearing red pants.

There's this dude - Sir Henri de Pantalon Rouge - who runs a blog solely dedicated to red trouser action.
So impressed and tickled am I, I found him elsewhere too.

Now I have a pair of red pants and a pair of red tights. Apparently they're not interchangeable, and the red tights do not hold as much gravitas as the pants.

But Red Trouser Finding Machine Man - Henri Pants - did snap this. With a warning to brace yourself.

Think it's fair to say:
1) I won't be wearing my red tights ever again, in fear that I might look even 1% like this
2) This woman has to be from the Ukraine. Right?

She Who Also Loves Tweed reckons they're red jeggings. I reckon her name is Olga from Lviv, wearing the Sergey 3000s.

But my red jeans? The most amazeballs piece of attire I've ever owned. This year.

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Welsh people with British-like tea instructions (Is Wales a real country?)

Welsh colleague: "It's your turn to mek a brew."

Peas: Fine. How do you take your tea?

Welsh: "Rye-te. It must be the cull-er of a tea bis-kitt. Lyk-e when you come off a tan-ning bed. Tan in cull-er.

Peas: So lots of milk?

Welsh: Nor. Well yes, but nor.

Peas: Dude.

Welsh: And don't put the milk in be-forr the tea bag. It clogs up the horles.

Peas: I always put the milk in before the tea bag.

Welsh: Why is it that ornly peep-ul from the Yoo Keh can mek tea? It's such a sim-ple exer-cyze.

Peas: Dude it still brews and blends at the end of the day.

Welsh: Nor. Yer me out. Bag first, milk sec-ond. Cull-er of a tea bis-kitt.

Peas: Yer me? You mean hear me out right?

Welsh: Nor. Yer me out.


Apparently I can't make tea. Chaos and dis-acceptance prevails.

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Male advice on hair - voluntarily given

The Quiet American: Dude. Isn't time to cut your hair?

Peas: And when would I have the time to do that?

[pause]

Hang on, what?

Quiet American: I'm merely saying that it might be time. You know, to try something new.

Peas: I don't 'do' new hair. Are you suggesting that it's crap? And I look like a raving Socialist?

Quiet American: No. I am just suggesting that you could try something maybe a little like this.

Peas: Eva Longoria? You ralise she has a stylist that travels with her everywhere and does all that shit for her, right?

Quiet American: It's more the layering.

Peas: Layering?

Quiet American: Yeah.

Peas: Right OK. You know you don't have hair right.

Quiet American: Yeah. but once someone told me to grow a beard. And I laughed in the face of facial hair for 6 months. Then I grew a beard and it changed my life.

Peas: Fair enough.

I've booked the appointment.

3 comments:

Kat said...

Thanks Peas I dont think I will ever get that picture out of my head. Those "pants" are wrong on so many levels.

Flarkit said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Flarkit said...

Producing a decent cuppa tea is a pleasurable practice which is therapeutic both for the maker and the recipient!

Just don't add the milk before you've allowed the tea to brew and stirred in the sugar! :D